2 level reception area- need advice

As soon as dinner is over, they will all filter down to the dance floor. Also- most of them smoke, so they will have to come down anyway to go outside. We’re one of the last couples in our circle to get married, and every wedding has been this way- eat, leave coat at seat, and party. We also don’t want to have our older relatives have to go upstairs, although there is an elevator for any walking issues. And finally, we don’t want to put family friends or neighbors up there because we don’t want them to feel like they were placed far away on purpose. I feel like our friends would almost look at it as a VIP scenario- “private bar…whattt?!” type thing. Our parents are telling us different. They think the friends should be closer to the dance floor to get the party started, as well as knowing some of our older relatives or family friends will leave shortly after dinner is finished. How would you seat our guests in the case?

This one is tricky...you say "we don’t want to put family friends or neighbors up there because we don’t want them to feel like they were placed far away on purpose"...this is how anyone will feel when they are sat up there. I wouldn't think VIP if you sat me up there, I would think I was a 2nd class guest you didn't care about as much for. Whoever is up there, may stay up there instead of come down to party since they have their own bar.

Is any there any tables that would allow you fit all the guests on one floor?

What you are planning sounds fine, If the older guests leave earlier friends that were seated upstairs can make use of their tables closer to the dance floor if they would like to.

^ that is what every single person will feel like. If you want the dance floor going then your friends need to be downstairs, with all their stuff. But that means older folks and family friends will be consigned to the hinterlands. No good solution.

OP, I am assuming this is a plated meal. Is that right? If people have to go up and down stairs to get food that would be a hard pass from me.

I agree with PP's on this. Your guests upstairs will more than likely feel like they are not as important as other guests who were invited to the wedding.

Personally, I wouldnt feel like a VIP if I was seated away from the majority of guests. I would feel like you chose a venue that didn't have enough space and I got bumped to overflow seating.

I was a guest at a wedding like this, was upstairs and did not like it. We couldn't see the first dance, cake cutting, etc. and pretty much felt left out

If this is ONLY for dinner, I don't think it's TOO big of a deal. But the upper level- can they see the bottom level for important moments like first dances, cake cutting etc. without having to move downstairs? Because it always sucks having to move around and strain to see.

ETA the top floor would only be 50 guests? I might reconsider that if there's room to make it more even. It definitely looks like an overflow area if there are only a few tables there.

Thanks for all the responses so far. The second floor is completely open with the railing wrapping all around and it looks directly down at the dance floor. It is so open, you can actually see 90% of the lower room, the 10% being what is directly below where you are standing (if that makes sense). To clarify, we would put all of our friends together upstairs- that being 60 people. So we would purposely lighten up the lower level. That way, all friends are 100% together and there is no question of some friends being more important than others, dictated by seating arrangements. The 6 or so tables would be placed right next to the railing- 3 on one side, 3 on the other, allowing all guests to see all dances and speeches during dinner. And yes, it's only for dinner. I have been to so many weddings with these same people that I know the deal- they will be super stoked to have their own bar during dinner, finish eating, and go dance, smoke, party, photobooth, etc.

I feel that what you are planning is fine. I went to my cousins/bff wedding and was seated on the second floor. It was fine we had a bar, and the photobooth was near us. NOT A BIG DEAL. You know your guest.

I may take the unpopular opinion here.

I was at a wedding like this, and had zero issues with it, I was seated on the second level. It was at a winery, so not quite like a grand ballroom, but it was completely fine. They sat us up there for similar reasons that you described, we were the young crowd, and I never once went back to my seat (I normally never do at a wedding anyway, I'm always up and about).

The only time I have a problem with this is when it's a different room, or completely separate and closed off. I don't really have a problem with what you're describing, honestly.

Curious if you are having a buffet or plated dinner?

@OriginalKD it will be plated.

I ran into a similar issue and opted to pick a set-up that allowed for all guests to be in the same room. It just doesn't feel right to put some people in a different room. Even if people are understanding about that kind of thing, there will still be that feeling of, "Welp, I guess we're the extras they couldn't fit."

In fact, might I add that the last wedding I went to I felt really unimportant because I was put directly next to a speaker. The whole night I could barely hear a thing. Dude, they're totally going to feel pushed aside if you put people in a separate room.

In fact, might I add that the last wedding I went to I felt really unimportant because I was put directly next to a speaker. The whole night I could barely hear a thing. Dude, they're totally going to feel pushed aside if you put people in a separate room.

I went to a wedding like this and was seated upstairs. We were seated against the railing overlooking the rest of the guests, like a lunch counter. I liked that we could actually see everyone else so it didn't feel like we were being "punished," but the problem was the chairs were too low to reach the table top to eat so we all had to stand the whole time to eat and the lunch counter was so skinny that people were spilling drinks over the edge onto the guest bellow. I think either way you are going to run into problems with this set-up.

I went to a wedding in a venue like this over the summer!

They had all family downstairs, and all friends upstairs.

The couple was mid-20s, so it was all 20-30 somethings upstairs and tons of us were friends (at least 30-40 people).

ALSO they just did a sweetheart table, so all wedding party was broken upstairs/downstairs too.

After first dances and food, they had everyone gather on the dance floor for a group picture, which was taken from above. As soon as that was done, the DJ launched a popular dance song and everyone started partying!

It actually worked really well

I'd appreciate being farther away from the festivities, wonder why I wasn't special enough to be down there with you, and stay in my hidey hole to watch everyone have fun. But that's just me.