I first want to say that I absolutely feel for the 2020 couples going through so much stress and at times multiple postponements! I can’t even imagine what you’re going through and I feel guilty about my worries as a Summer 2021 bride! But for me, wedding planning and all of the events leading up to the wedding also mean so much and I feel like the pandemic has taken that away. I am an obsessive planner and I got so much joy from creating a detailed timeline of when things were going to happen—but now, our engagement party was canceled, we had to book our caterer without the personalized tasting, wedding dress shopping is on hold, our “will you be my bridesmaid?” brunch is on hold, etc. Our engagement shoot is next weekend (I planned for a summer shoot to send STDs by September), but it just feels like an odd time to send Save the Dates with so much loss happening.
We’re in NYC and things are better than the terrible weeks we endured in March/April/May but the uncertainty is worrying me. We are also very risk averse—to me it’s not about the restrictions being lifted, it’s about not wanting to risk people’s lives for a party. My fiancé is an RN and cares for Covid+ patients at his hospital so we have not hung out with any of our family members for months. We are both very close to our families and usually see them very often so it’s been hard and I often don’t feel like wedding planning and it sucks because I love planning! I never imagined things would unravel this way when it first began here in March but now I am worried about what 2021 will look like. We have put deposits down on all major vendors already but I would hate to think that we’re being naive about our expectations given how long it would take for a vaccine to be made available to the public. I know other couples have had virtual/socially distanced weddings, but that is definitely not for us! We’ve been together for a very long time and feel like we are practically married, so the celebration with our family and friends would be the most special thing about our wedding. We would want people socializing and having fun without masks, without the distance, and without the fear or health risk!
I guess this post is just a rant that many times I feel guilty saying out loud (there are so many actual horrible things in this world!), but I just wondered if others feel the same about the loss in wedding planning joy and rituals these days. I am trying to just be grateful and stay positive, but it’s hard! I am also curious about how you would feel as a guest receiving a Save the Date for a wedding for next August (I’m a summer girl and want the photos to reflect the season so I’m sending them very early)? Would you be excited about it or think “who’s planning a wedding in the middle of a pandemic?”/“that might have to be canceled”? I just don’t want to be insensitive to the times/others’ struggles because I am not feeling very joyous myself.
Sorry for the long post!