400 Guest Wedding Planning

Not weird to do a wedding with that many people -' my own wedding is bordering 300 and YES I TALK TO THESE PEOPLE! Not doing it for gifts or any reason other than we have many close friends and family we want there and financially we can afford it. HOWEVER, I do agree with others that if this is the case, you should invite everyone to the both the ceremony and reception.

I don't even know if I could name 400 people. I feel like you would have to invite everyone you have ever met. There is no way you are that close to that many people (obviously since they are not all invited to your ceremony).

My guest list is currently sitting at 406. Everyone invited to the reception is invited to the ceremony. FH and I are both only children, but have huge extended families (I grew up with my 3rd cousins). It's not uncommon for a family vacation to be 100+ people. Mix that with all my FH friends that he speaks to on at least a weekly basis, I'm grateful for the number we have.

We're doing a buffet for dinner (ceremony begins at 5pm) and will have a few different stations set up so the line doesn't get crazy long.

If you have the budget and the space for 400 people, I see nothing wrong with it personally. Larger weddings are quite common in the South that were from.

Just cause they;re related doesn't mean they need to be invited.

For 400 guests you need at least three of each station if it's a station that is an 'action station' meaning the guest have pasta made to order or have to pick toppings to put on their mashed potatoes.

If you're doing buffets? You need 6 of them at least.

And 4000 pounds of ice.

Sobering, eh?

OMG...really? "Be ruthless when you go through your guest list. I went over mine with my family and was able to CUT my guest list to 300 people. That was just round one. There are people I adore but logistically my venue can't handle that many people, so I have to make some tough decisions. I've minimized it as much as I could, but some people are just going to have to deal."

"Ruthless"? We're talking about a wedding, not saving a business by firing half of the employees, "Some people are just going to have to deal", despite the fact that your culture demands you send an invitation to people you can't afford to host? What is this? It makes no sense, in any facet of society. It's time the page turns and every individual you've ever met realize that weddings are five figure events, and the reality of red ink says not everyone is getting an invitation. We're no longer living in a society in which the whole town comes out and showers the couple with reception food and drink. This is for real, American society, and now the rule is "I don't invite those I cannot afford to host unless I go into debt, and I don't need 400 people at my wedding when half of them will detract from the experience that my important guests, 150 of them, those who actually think about me more than three times a year, will have to deal with."

Buffet for 400 people? That sounds like a clusterfuck.

If I were to invite all of my family living within an hour of me, that I see several times a year (minimum of 4 big family parties a year...tradition), it would total 294 people. That's just my mom's side. Add in family from dad's side and fh's family and I could easily hit 400 people. I would love to invite them all, but properly hosting a number I can afford is more important. And that means good, safe food and lots of free drinks for everyone. I would be a moron if I tried to do that for 400ppl on $8k. I would be ashamed for my family to see me as such a cheap-ass. Not even touching the tiered reception bit.

I get the large number of guests. Truly, I do. My fiancé and I ran into a problem like this. Know how we solved it? We cut the list significantly because we couldn't afford serving that many people an actual meal.

Tapas? Appetizers? I can't.

Have we even discussed drink packages? I would be curious to know what OP is doing for that...

I don't even know or like 100 people.

I get that a guest list can be huge BUT if you don't want them witnessing your marriage then they don't get to come to the reception. Only exception is for cultural reasons as described in other peoples post. While tapas may be fine, just make sure you have literally a ton of them; it's 8pm people will be hungry. I don't know about you but I can down a whole tray of pigs in a blanket all by myself and if im going to a wedding, you best believe im going to eat and not just a little bit here and there.

If you want a party, throw a house party like a month afterwards.

Just wanted to put my two cents - I am doing a tiered ceremony/reception. For SURE! And it's not abnormal to our community.

If you accommodate for all guests, it's not gift grabby. Many people do not give any gift, especially if its this many people there or their gift is small or even just a card. I don't see what's wrong with hosting a large party for family and friends.

I'm not understanding why the bride cannot choose who can see her get married? There isn't a rule that you have to see the ceremony if you're at the reception, is there? Maybe this is an American cultural rule.

I can't imagine how it works with such a large crowd, especially how the event is paid for. But it seems that some cultures involve a whole town in the celebration. Do these turn out to be pot luck?

No, we pay for the food. But the community donates money in other ways.