Am i being petty or am i justified to be upset with my friends?

My group of friends and I have been really close friends. My husband and I did elope this month but had two months preparation for the wedding so everything was rushed.


My friends were all busy, except one, with college so I hadn't expected any of them to be much help for this one event but would be there where it mattered. I have had a bit of drama with them about the colour of the dress, where we decided that I'd pick the colour and they pick their own dress since it's last minute. But I couldn't decide their colour until I picked out my dress (it's an Indian wedding so could wear whatever colour I liked) and they were being very persistent asking about the colour. So I did get very annoyed and told them to wear one colour they all seemed to like and I'd avoid that colour. My reaction shocked them because they thought they were being helpful by having their coloured picked first but I had to explain (which I had already done before) that my colour of my dress options would be restricted because I wouldn't want to be the same colour as the bridesmaid and want it to be complimentary. One of my friends admitted that she distanced herself from me after this conversation saying my reaction was abrupt and abrasive.
Things moved on and when we had the engagement party which my partner organised as a surprise for me, I showed up seeing none of them there. They all said they were busy because they have to study for an exam or prepare an assignment, and another said it was inconvenient for them to attend as they had an early start at work the following day. I got really sad and started crying that no one showed up or inconvenience their life a little to attend. I tried bringing this up to one of them telling them I felt so lonely but they said it was unfair of me to be upset when they were all busy and lied to me that they were originally able to attend the first date of the engagement party but not the second date (they were given two weeks notice for the changed date). No one even asked how was the engagement party was afterwards, and I noticed none of them really asked me how I was during the wedding planning. It felt like they distanced themselves entirely after the one drama with the colour of the dress.
Since then, I've been very uncomfortable with them. I tried to bring it up with the others but they all tell me their stressed and can't talk to me about it or shut the topic immediately. I have been hearing from my other friend that they seemed very unresponsive and uninterested in the wedding planning. But because I had the one friend who was always there for me, I've been heavily relying and consoling in her. This seemed to annoyed the group and apparently are being really rude to my friend who has been helping.
Am I being petty for being hurt and mad at them for not attending? I probably have been snappy here and there, and I'm surprised I reacted this way too because I wasn't expecting the extreme stress that comes with the wedding planning like with parents, in laws and even other family members. And without them really trying to be involved, I felt so lonely. For context, the friend that was helping didn't live in the same city as me. I said this to one friend and she said it wasn't right for me to be rude. This really shocked me. Felt like my feelings were completely invalidated.
Now I have no idea if my group of friends are annoyed with me or even cares. I try talking to them but still don't get much from them. I keep convincing myself they're busy but I can't help be worried about that they hate me because I was upset they weren't all there for me during my wedding.