Amount to tell caterer

Our vendor required an exact count 2 weeks prior to our wedding. My RSVPs were due the week before so I could follow up with unanswered RSVPs. We did have some changes in our count on our actual wedding day (my grandparents decided they wanted a plated meal the day of when they didn't want one before) and my vendor handled it like professionals because they had made sure to have some extra plates for situations like that.

I work in events and I have had to leverage this before. It is certainly always safest to order against your count. But it is true that most caterers DO account for a small percentage over the count for just in case scenarios (like something spills for example). This is usually 5-10% of the total. What you do should really depend on what food you are serving. If this is a plated meal, then the accurate total amount is really important. Even if they will provide more. If you are working in a buffet situation however, you CAN stretch food a little. Because portion per person is not guaranteed. And not everyone will want everything. I have had to do this in the past when working with a very tight budget. In these case you CAN take into account that 5% overage and plan for it. Just know that if someone decides to gorge themselves, someone is likely to miss out. But that is the case at any buffet meal. Meals like self-serve or buffet pasta, salad, make your own sandwiches work best in this scenario. As a professional, I don't think there's any shame in considering how to best work the system as long as you understand the risks. You are not cheating anyone. The caterers will bring what they bring count + percentage no matter what. So you will be paying for what you order. If you order less and try to play into that extra, they will still be bringing the correct amount of food + overage for the count provided.

In any case, if you can afford to pay to your accurate headcount you are guaranteed to have no issues. I would also discourage going over. The caterer will be prepared with a little extra. You are spending for no reason there.

But make your decision and stick to it. They need several weeks to plan orders, staff, prep times etc. No changes on site.