Annoyed..

This sounds like the issues I had! I just wanted some small and simple, but my MOH got a little carried away and excited about a comedy show we wanted to go to just the two of us and ended up making that my bachelorette party and turning it into a weekend thing that no one could really afford so I was going to have to cover more for my bridesmaids to attend. I eventually just told my MOH that I don't want that to be my bachelorette and I wanted something smaller and now we're working out how to deal with the fact that we have 3 extra tickets to this show lol.

I would put your foot down and say that's not what you want, or just straight up tell them that it's not in your budget so things are going to have to be a bit more chill once you get there.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this! I hope everything works out.

View Quoted Comment Sadly we leave on Friday 😩 I’m not trying to sound selfish but if they wanted to plan a trip for me they should cover all the costs of it.. our wedding has cost us 25,000 + so far and me and my fiancé have 3 small children and I stay at home while he works (HVAC)

View Quoted Comment I’m happy to get a break from my crazy girls but I’m not happy that I’m going to have to spend so much money

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They definitely should've asked for budgets before doing something like this. And I guess I'm confused because I've normally seen that the bridal party splits the cost of the bride for like everything, so I'm surprised they didn't do that if they're planning this whole trip.

I totally understand! Weddings are SO expensive and when everything is budgeted it's hard to add sudden extra expenses. I was feeling the same way about our original plan, because the MOH started bringing up staying a night or two in a hotel without asking for budgets and like half of the bridal party blew their budget on tickets to the show so they couldn't pitch in for the hotel rooms and I was looking at footing the bill for those to make everything work out. Only for people to leave in the morning because they wouldn't have money to do anything else.

I don't think you sound selfish at all. It's nice that they've planned everything, but they planned it out of your means and are now expecting you to pay.

It's standard for the bride to not pay. Usually the girls, or possibly the MOH, would pay fully for the bride. No way should you be paying unless it was agreed on before hand.

TELL THEM ! It’s crazy of them to do this and super important they respect your budget. Tell them that it’s sweet of them to want to plan but you can’t spend for all those activities, so some need to get crossed off the list. It doesn’t need to ruin the whole weekend, just try to eliminate a few high $$ activities

Unfortunately that is a common issue that crops up with the expensive destination weekends. If you are unable to pay, tell them immediately that their current plan is not feasible and needs to be fixed asap.

View Quoted Comment We leave Friday morning … Luckily my fiancé worked extra hard and over time for me to go and enjoy myself but it still bothers me that they planned something without talking to me and just assuming I would be ok with the cost 😫

View Quoted Comment I still think that you owe it to yourself to say something. Timing doesn’t matter, they really screwed something up here and should know. And maybe there’s something cancelable or refundable or that they can just eat the cost for. Expecting the bride to cover her share without consulting her on the budget is seriously inconsiderate, and attention should be brought to it.


Frankly if I was a non-planning guest on a bach weekend and I realized the planners were expecting the bride to cover costs on everything without getting a say, I’d be uncomfortable and would go out of my way to cover something (Ex a ticket or a meal) for the bride !

That's supposed to be a let loose day for you but all they are paying is the hotel. That's not how its supposed to go and they just amuse that everything else was on you that's not right. It would have been nice if you all had talk this over. So everyone k we what was excepted of them I hope that you turns around for you. I was just told give them a list name and numbers I did asked questions I was told no. I dont even know where it is just dates.