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MONICA
Savvy June 2021

Are Honeymoon Funds a No No?

MONICA, on February 8, 2021 at 4:12 PM

Posted in Registry 71

I was reading another post about wedding "no no's" I read all about how people think the honeymoon fund or giving tree/wishing well is a no go. But we've been together for 12 years we really don't "need" anything. Most people want to give you something so why end up with a bunch of things we don't...

I was reading another post about wedding "no no's" I read all about how people think the honeymoon fund or giving tree/wishing well is a no go. But we've been together for 12 years we really don't "need" anything. Most people want to give you something so why end up with a bunch of things we don't "need"? I was planning on doing sending in the invite a note saying no gifs but if you insist just contribute to honeymoon fund but now I'm concerned that will be tacky. Thoughts? TIA!

71 Comments

  • MONICA
    Savvy June 2021
    MONICA ·
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    And before internet what did people do...they put it on the invites. And word of mouth? HAHAHA

    This cracks me up! Thanks for the reply Smiley smile

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  • B
    Savvy April 2023
    Bri ·
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    From my knowledge, it was never on the invite. My mother got married in the early 70s and she didn’t put it on the invite.... I even asked my grandmother out of curiosity and she thought putting it on the invite is incredibly rude. She’s 93... lol. Of course, do what you please but I guess it’s not “proper etiquette”, if you care about that BS. lol
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  • Yanna
    Just Said Yes May 2021
    Yanna ·
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    I don't think there's anything wrong with it. My fiance and I are doing a honeyfund for date nights, cash gifts, and airfare/ hotels, because we travel a lot and really just don't want a bunch of physical stuff. However, I would put it on your wedding website not your invitation. That's just my opinion though

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  • Katie
    Dedicated May 2023
    Katie ·
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    I can't recall any wedding invitation that I've received over the past 5 years that contained registry information. Shower invitations maybe, but not for the event itself. I agree with others that putting registry or gifting information on the invitation makes it seem like the purpose of your invitation is to get a gift (which of course, for a shower it essentially is). I think in modern times this information is usually present on the website, and in the past/with older relatives it has generally been the matriarchs' responsibility to pass along the registry information ("Oh thanks Aunt Gladys, I'm so excited too - oh what's that? John and Jane are registered with Bed Bath & Beyond and Target...")

    I personally fall into the camp of "if you don't tell them what to give, they'll give cash" and have found that to be true in my friend circle - I will buy a physical gift for a shower but I am not lugging a wrapped gift along with me to the wedding on top of all of the other things to worry about. I'd much prefer to put a check in the envelope with my card and tuck away in my purse. Obviously you need to know your crowd but I'd rather leave it unsaid.

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  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth ·
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    I don't think it's very polite to write a note about gifts in the invites. Just make a tiny registry and people will probably give money
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  • mrswinteriscoming
    VIP December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
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    I disagree with this. There is absolutely no need to create a registry just for the sake of it when OP doesn't need anything for the home.

    Nothing like winding up with 4 china teacups that you will never use!

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  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth ·
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    I don't believe that people can't think of 3 things to register for that they actually want
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  • Vicky
    VIP January 2020
    Vicky ·
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    No, they definitely did not put it on the invitations. It was always spread via word of mouth.

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  • Marcia
    Expert March 2021
    Marcia ·
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    Why do people work requests for cash gifts as "donations"? You and your partner are not a charity. It is a gift of money.
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  • B
    Dedicated March 2017
    Barbara ·
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    Sorry, but I find the concept distasteful. The honeyfund concept is like having a cash bar at the reception. Essentially, you're asking people to underwrite your honeymoon (or wedding or mortgage). If you've got everything you need, it might be nice to point people in the direction of charity. We did that, but also got some restaurant gift cards and theatre and sporting event tickets, which were also great.

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  • Lauren
    Dedicated September 2021
    Lauren ·
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    My cousin's wedding just past and they just didn't have a registry at all. So when people asked about it they told them directly that they would prefer money/gift cards to help them build a deposit for their first home.

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