Aunt plus 1

I know I had concerns about people getting along at my wedding, but they all managed to put their feelings aside and act like adults. I hope the same can be said for your family, but your aunt sounds rather childish if her whole reason for inviting Bill is just to make your uncle jealous.

Jesus. Maybe you can text you aunt and say Due to COVID restrictions we are now unable to honor the plus one we added for you. I'm sorry I hope this news does not come as an inconvenience.

Oh wow this is tough. I don't think she should be bringing anyone you don't care for nor someone to make your uncle jealous.

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I would do that, but she is also my baker for my cupcakes and my venue sent her the new rules that need to be followed along with how many we can so it's like she kind of knows that she could easily have a plus 1 when we are below 288 and only have 89 people attending.

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Yeah and they haven't like been together in like 20 years so I'm not sure why she is doing this. I think it's because my uncle didn't bother to tell them that his girlfriend was coming until end of July. So in a weird way he had it coming because he didn't go about it in the best manner either. Actually he wanted my mom and I to tell my aunt and cousin about this girlfriend. That didn't happen.

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Dang. I'm sorry. I hope they will all act like adults for your big day!

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I guess I don't understand why your uncle has to report to your aunt about who he is dating.

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At this point I would rather have Bill lol! At least I won't have someone dancing on tables and yes I'm not even kidding we went to their camper one weekend and that is what my aunt's friend Cheryl was doing. It was so inappropriate.

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I guess I don't either. But they have been going out for 2 years and my uncle has seen my cousin, her kids and my aunt on numerous occasions I feel like that is something that would of been brought up by now..

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In my opinion, it sounds like your aunt just needs to grow up. My friend who lives with her mom didn't even realize her mom had a boyfriend for over a year until she came home from work early one day and he was sitting in their living room. It sounds like your aunt and uncle's family situation is complicate. If he is seeing someone that is his business and he isn't required to tell anyone, but the bride and groom if he plans on bringing a date to the wedding. I just hope your aunt can be an adult about the situation.

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I'm hoping she will just give my uncle and his GF the cold shoulder. I have seen her do it to past girlfriends my uncle has had. Hoping it goes the same way. I can ignore that at least on the day of.

Say a prayer she behaves like an adult. If they have relationship issues that needs to be resolved in another setting that is not your wedding. Maybe see if you can get security for the day to remove any troublemakers.

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Oh I have been. And they do have issues that need to be resolved. Maybe that would be a good idea...I don't know. I'm hoping she just gives them (uncle and GF) the cold shoulder as she has done before.

It's always better to be prepared and not need something than to figure out what to do when you don't have it.

I think it would be ok to tell her that you can't honor the plus one in this time

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True. My mom has told my aunt that if she tries to bring Cheryl that my mom is kicking them both out so I know that isn't going to be an issue.

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It wouldn't be considered bad etiquette?

View Quoted Comment Good. Hopefully it won't get to that point.

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It would technically be bad etiquette, but COVID has made it impossible to follow a lot of the etiquette rules and I think your aunt crossed the bad etiquette bridge by asking to bring a guest just to spite someone else. Now, since it's clear that she holds a grudge, it may not be the best idea to take back the invitation to Bill because you don't want her to react by refusing to make your cupcakes. However, if it turns out that Bill isn't available, you can tell her, "we really only want to have people we're close to at our wedding. I kind of regretted telling you that you could bring someone, but since you already said you were bringing Bill, I didn't want to take that away from you. But now that he he can't make it, we really don't want you to bring someone else."

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That makes sense I think that is what I will do. If Bill can make it, that's fine but the plus 1 isn't going to someone else especially someone I don't like. Thank you