Bachelorette Party with Maid of Honor under 21?

If it were me I would change the plans. Do something your sister can join in. Do a big 21 for her in Vegas if you want. But ultimately this is for your bridal party to plan... it should be up to them and that would take your sister into account since she'd be planning it.

I know this is something you've always wanted and maybe she isn't going to tell you it would be cruddy for her because she loves you and knows this is what you have always wanted. Let your bridal party plan what they want and let them know Vegas is not a must do.

A bachelorette party is not a given and it may not be exactly what you want but it sounds like your party wants you to have fun and have a good time and wll be thoughtful about what they choose - Vegas or no.

Talk to her about it. Say exactly this. You love her and want her to be the MOH, but you also have always had a dream for the big Vegas bachelorette blowout. I mean, that's not a crime. And I don't think that you should have to miss out because of your sister's age. That's not her fault, but it's not yours, either.

If you're close enough for her to be your MOH, you're close enough to have a conversation about this. Lay it out. The bachelorette thing is kinda separate from standing next to you at your ceremony. I mean, yes, generally the MOH plans the bachelorette party, but it doesn't ALWAYS have to be this way. Do you have a party-loving bridesmaid? Have her take the lead on it if your sister doesn't want to plan a party that she can't be a part of.

If she's cool with this, then, talk to her about her being in Vegas but not being able to come out for the drinks. What can you both do to make sure that she has fun? Certainly, have her invite a friend and maybe they can go see something awesome that night, given that Vegas has all kinds of entertainment. Cirque du Soleil, burlesque shows, music acts, that sort of thing. Maybe you cover it for her and the friend as a token of gratitude? I mean, it's not either your fault or her fault that the drinking laws in the US are kind of stupid. You just have to deal with it.

How old will your sister be at the time that you will be having your party? If she's 17... it may be easier to wait until she's at least 18. That'll give her more options. There are tons of things to do in Vegas even if you aren't 21.

I would say do the Vegas trip but simply don't have her go. I went to Vegas when I was 17 and there is a lot of things that I couldn't do - even things that didn't involve drinking. Just talk to her about it and then perhaps do something special with the two of you.

If you didn't do Vegas - you would likely still do something that involved bars & alcohol and she would still be left out.

I would stick with Vegas and let her bring a friend that she can hang out with at night while you are out clubbing with your friends that are of age. I would make sure that the day time and dinner activities were planned at places that allow minors as well so she can be included in most of the fun.

I have a kind of similar situation, I have 2 bridesmaids that are under 18(my baby sister and niece who will be 17 and 15 at the time of the wedding, I told my 2 MOH's and my other bridesmaid (my older sister and mother to my niece-bridesmaid) that I was ok having a wild and all out bachelorette party, BUT if we did that I'd like to also do something minor friendly that included the other two at some point. Told them that I was willing to pay for the "minor friendly" party even so that they weren't having to pay for 2 get-togethers.