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Just Said Yes August 2024

Best friend is annoyed i got engaged

Elaina, on April 1, 2023 at 10:45 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 11
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My best friend got engaged with her Fiancé in August of 2022. She didn’t know how she could afford it and her Fiancé doesn’t want to get married right away so they were planning for 2025 but still don’t have a date. My boyfriend of 8 years proposed about 2 weeks ago and I knew she would feel a certain way about it just by knowing her. When I told her we were planning for 2024 she said that they might also get married in 2024 now. After some discussion she admitted that she’s happy but annoyed that we got engaged and will have a wedding around the same time. She feels that we will have to share our engagements and wedding times. I was going to choose her to be my MOH but now I feel that I should give it to my cousin who has always been there for me. My best friend has her own wedding to plan for and apparently she’s annoyed that I’m even getting married. Any advice on how to handle this?

11 Comments

Latest activity by Elaina, on April 6, 2023 at 1:50 PM
  • Alyssa
    Super October 2023
    Alyssa ·
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    Is she even your best friend? Like I was over the moon excited when I was engaged and then my BFF got engaged. And when she asked if I slwas fine with her getting married 2 months after me I was so excited, said money will be tight but we got it. She ended up getting married before me. Wedding planning with your best friend is fun. Talk about vendors, tell each other about sketchy contracts, people, reviews. Not to mention if she gets married after you she will know what to do and what not to do.


    I don't understand her jealousy, is she always jealous?
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  • E
    Just Said Yes August 2024
    Elaina ·
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    I wouldn’t say she’s always jealous but we’ve gone through things like this with birthday parties because our birthdays are so close. Our relationships are also very different and her fiancé is not involved and doesn’t even want to start planning and on my side my fiancé wanted to get married this year in the fall (not happening). So I do feel that there’s a level of jealousy which is not what I want my MOH to feel like. It’ll probably end up being my cousin.
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  • C
    CM ·
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    We had a number of friends and close family get married within weeks or months of our wedding. A real friend would feel nothing but happy for you. My guess is this is a reflection of her insecurity, self centeredness, and over the top expectations.


    From what you say your cousin sounds like a much better choice.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    What? Your friend sounds problematic. I might avoid talking weddings with her, because it sounds like it might get competitive. I would think twice before considering having her as MOH.

    You're not getting married for more than a year, I would hold off on deciding on the wedding party until early 2024 anyway.

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  • T
    Expert May 2010
    Theresa ·
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    I would think twice about having her in the bridal party at all, much less as MOH. Use the excuse that you know money is an issue and you don't want to put financial pressure on her. I would also caution against telling her anything about your wedding plans or you may find her doing the same thing as you are, only a month earlier once she learns your date.

    Good luck, and congratulations on your engagement!

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Real friends don’t act like this. Stop discussing details and reevaluate the friendship, especially if she has a history of jealousy.
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  • S
    Just Said Yes March 2024
    Sabrina ·
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    I'm happy for you! I think you should ask her if it's wrong to feel like you need to ask whether or not it'd be okay to invite her to be your MOH. How you feel about what her response could be or how you think she feels.
    It'll get her thinking, and get her to show her true character. Honestly, I don't see why she would be upset since you've been with your SO for much longer, and had no idea she changed her mind on her year planned.
    Hope things turn out positively!
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  • Taylor
    VIP October 2022
    Taylor ·
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    She doesn’t get to hold up the rest of your life until she gets to do things first. She’s not a really friend. We got married within two weeks of my husbands cousin who had already put off her wedding twice due to Covid and we did not and no one had hard feelings. Because you get your one day and that’s it. I wouldn’t include her in your wedding party at all and I’d even reevaluate the entire friendship
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  • Brittany
    Dedicated July 2023
    Brittany ·
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    I had a MOH similar to this during my first wedding, though a bit different. I separated myself from the friendship not long after the wedding because the wedding brought out the absolute worst in her. So in light of my experience I'd say it's wise to go with your cousin for MOH, and as others have said, maybe reconsider the friendship as a whole. If this is her reaction to your engagement, I'd say the friendship is not likely to go far. It will only get worse.

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  • Brittany
    Dedicated July 2023
    Brittany ·
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    I kind of think her true character was being annoyed that a friend got engaged. Kind of speaks for itself.

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  • E
    Just Said Yes August 2024
    Elaina ·
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    I agree thanks for the advice and sharing a bit of your story.
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