Best Man Dropped Out, Now Wants My Husband To Be His Best Man

Is Adam your husband or a 3rd person?

Personally, I'd be upset and not want DH to be in the wedding because I wouldn't want to spend any money or time on it. But ultimately, your DH already made the call without talking to you, which would also upset me, because now you have to live with it.

You were married months ago, (congrats) just forget about it and move on. It's all in the past now.

It's up to your husband. Maybe steve had something going on. as shitty as it was.

As messed up as the situation is, working is a valid reason. Also you shouldn't find replacement GM.

You can be mad but ultimately it's your husbands choice if he does or does not want to be in the wedding. They didn't ask you to be in it so you shouldn't project your feelings like you are.

You're being mad for your husband when he clearly isn't mad. Let it go. This was a situation for them as friends to work out, you shouldn't be involved. If they're on good terms and he wants to be the BM, be supportive.

Brieliz, Adam is my husband, I'm sorry I forgot to clarify.

Meagen, the worst part is that Steve didn't even put any time or money into his role as best man. His job was to pay for his rental suit and show up, and he did neither! And I had to have a long talk with my husband about considering one another in our decisions, because this nonsense is pretty hurtful to me.

FutureMrsE, thank you! I'm trying so hard to forget about it, but I just do not feel like Steve deserves a best man as good and dedicated as my husband.

My rude and petty self wishes that my husband would drop out of Steve's wedding 9 days before the event, but I'm blessed to have a husband that it too kind and caring to do that.

Weddings are not tit for tat.

As long as he isn't offended- fine let it be. It's your husband's choice. Stop being mad for him.

I'm stubborn. I would tell my FH if it were him that this friend didn't even have the courtesy to mention he wouldn't be in it until 9 DAYS prior, and that's when you had to reach out and ask. It's like, was he planning on just not mentioning it until the day of? I wouldn't be happy. It is your husbands choice but if a BM did that to me, it would be hard for me to want to help her later.

I wouldn't want to spend money on someone else's wedding as a best man if they did that to me. However, depending on how you and fh split finances it's really his choice.

Personally tho, I would have said no

The men in our bridal party didn't have to pay for their tuxedo rentals. The bridesmaids didn't have to pay for their gowns. That was a priority, for us.

I mean, it sucks, but there's nothing you can do about it. I don't hold grudges or get upset about many things, so that might just be me. I would just let it go. Your husband seems to not mind, so let him do what he wants.

You're upset because Steve dropped out of your wedding and then months later he asked your H to be his best man. This sounds like a non-issue. If your H had moved on and still has a solid friendship with Steve, awesome. Be happy for Steve and move on too.