Best man's wife being difficult

I’m not a fan of giving into people’s unreasonable demands but if you’re willing to change things could you have the groomsmen enter from the front and just the bridesmaids walk down? They would still have to walk together in the recessional though.

I feel like you need to talk to FH about whether or not he needs to be best man. It sounds like he can't or doesn't want to fulfill the duty. Maybe he'd be better off as a guest.

Have him Usher.

You could have the wedding party walk alone or just have the MOH and BM walk alone and the rest of the wedding party in pairs. You could maybe also try talking to the wife? she sounds a little crazy and possessive though so there may not be any good in that. I wouldn’t have her in the wedding party at all like i wouldn’t even consider it.

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He is his only brother and definitely wants him to be the best man.
best man wants to be there for him and for me but he doesn't want his wife to make a scene like she did at the last wedding we all attended

No, it's super weird she wants to be in the wedding party with her husband even though she isn't. Almost all our wedding party was in relationships/married but obviously they walked out in the recessional in pairs & into the reception. I'm sorry you are dealing with this!

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Im thinking of alternatives but i honestly do not want to change how i want my wedding to be for anyone, especially someone who doesnt mean that much to me...

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I agree and no i do not want to give into her unreasonable demands... i honestly would be happy if she doesnt show up at all but i also don't want to be the reason for any issues in their marriage

I think you should consider having best man walk alone, or have the men walk in from the side before the ceremony and have just the girls walk down the aisle. I know that you have an image in your head of how you want your day to be, so do I. I think its weird the girlfriend is being crazy about the whole thing but you did say she is not American, how long has she been here? A long time or no? As I see your side I can also see her side and maybe she just feels uncomfortable because its not part of her culture or she does not understand. I know you mentioned she has been told before how it works and everything but I think for the sake of your wedding and avoiding drama you either have the men enter beforehand and not walk down the aisle as pairs or if that's not an option you need to talk to FH about what to do. Maybe he needs to step down as best man.

What if the best man and maid of honor walked separately? Like family, groom, best man, paired bridal party, moh, flower girl/ring bearer and then you? Or if you have a flower girl, she and the moh could walk together and ring bearer and best man could walk together. Or the best man and moh could walk with your family and be the escorts? I know it's not ideal but it's not condoning the behavior, it's just trying to make it a happier experience that day. I'd personally rather change the lineup than deal with drama with her.

Could they each walk alone? Solves the problem of the emotional wife and also gives each a little more time in the spotlight to go with the 'of honor' position?

View Quoted Comment I totally understand. But you would not be the cause of any issues in their marriage, her lack of trust is the cause of their issues. None of this falls on you!

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I'm trying to picture it and its totally not what i want. i only plan on getting married once and i should be able to have it the way i want! shes eastern european. shes been here for 3-4 years i believe.
thank you for your suggestions but i feel like its not fair to me to have to change my wedding around for her. shes making my wedding about her and i'm honestly over her and her drama and i do not want her to "win" in this aspect. i dont want to be unreasonable and i dont want her to not come because of this but im just so annoyed at this point :/

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I dont hate the idea of flower girl/ MOH and best man/ring bearer but i dont love it either lol' thank you for the suggestion!

View Quoted Comment Haha fair enough. I think that it would be hard to love a different option when you're annoyed at the wife so I totally get it! Good luck!

I had a similar problem but with my bridesmaid.

I allowed the bridesmaid to walk down the aisle solo, but they had do the recessional in pairs, as well as be introduced in pairs. Her bf was giving her a hard time about it, but I simply said - that if she isn't comfortable with doing either, than she can attend the wedding as a guest. This is FH & I wedding, & we are paying a lot for the day. I refuse to change certain things to accommodate ridiculous requests.

I wouldn't give in to that ridiculous behavior, it's your wedding and her husband has agreed to be a part of it. That's between the two of them. He needs to decide if he's going to tolerate her childish and unreasonable behavior and not do a 30 second walk as the best man for his brother's wedding, or if he tells her to grow up and get over it. Hate to be that blunt, but people who act that way shouldn't get their way just because they throw a tantrum.

That is the standard wedding processional/recessional and you don’t need to change it if you don’t want to. She needs to understand that it is acceptable for him to walk 100 feet (if that) back down the aisle next to another woman. He’s not cheating on her and nobody thinks he is. I’m sure he walks next to women all the time in his daily life but she probably doesn’t have any qualms about that. Do not make any exceptions for her. And have FH let his brother know that she needs to accept it, not make a scene, or come to the reception only, which it would be more acceptable to have groomsmen enter without bridesmaids

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THANK YOU MELISSA!

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I AGREE WITH YOU 100%