Bridal Party Hair

I don't think its a problem requesting that they wear their hair up. I asked all of my bridal party to wear their hair up in a specific style and it wasn't a problem. As for your friend I would have a sit down and maybe talk with her about trying to control your wedding.

I don't think the request is unreasonable, but a lot of women don't like their hair up. Maybe the extra money is burdening and that's why there is a complaint and if that's the case you should offer to help pay.

Maybe your one BM is jealous and that's why she's so outspoken, I'd speak directly to her and confront the situation before it gets worse and a friendship ends.

Agree with Veronica. If they're paying, they get to choose. But really, the bottom line is that bridesmaids are there because these are important people in your life and you want them by your side on this very special day. Don't get into it over hair. I know it seems like a huge thing now, but I promise you, a few years from now, you'll realize it isn't a big deal and if you end up losing someone close to you over it, you'll regret it.

Also, there could be a reason she doesn't want her hair up. I love having my hair up, but one of my closest friends has a nasty scar from a childhood dog bite on her cheek and she would never wear her hair up. Even in Georgia summers around friends, she kept her very thick hair down. I have another friend who will wear a ponytail or put her hair up casually, but she hates how it makes her face look (she has a very round face) so even if her hair is up or back, she'll take it down if she has her picture taken. The point is, people have different reasons for wearing their hair a certain way and I don't think it's ok for you to decide for them how they should wear it. They're not props and that could be how they're made to feel if you dictate too much. I think the only thing brides should request of bridesmaids is the dress. If hair and makeup is required, the bride should pay or at least split the cost and the bridesmaid should get a say in what she looks like.

I don't think it is out of line, but does it really matter that much to you that your girls hair is up? This isn't something I would waste my energy on.

Personally I feel like the bridesmaid should just do what you want it is your day but also they are paying for their hair/make-up so they should have the ability to choose how they want to have it done. I've been in several weddings and even if the hair styles are different if you have a great hair stylist they can make sure it complements the bride. In the end it is a trend right now to have bridesmaids have different hair styles and dresses. I am paying for all my bridesmaids hair and make-up for that day as a thank you. I have shown them several styles I like and would be okay with them choosing and they are picking from that list. I put some updo's, half up/down, and down so they do have some flexibility but with my final approval since I picked the styles. So basically if you want to have complete control over hair/make-up I think you should offer to pay and then they can't really complain. But again I know that is a HUGE financial cost.

I hope it works out and she changes her mind for you otherwise you may just have to pay to get you what you want.

Keep in mind that you love your friends for their unique qualities and not their "symmetry." Do consider allowing them to express themselves a little in a way that makes them feel beautiful and excited to be part of your day.

It sounds like maybe she is jealous of you or just isn't comfortable with what you want. Is she married? If not, then she is probably upset that you are getting married, but she isn't. If she is married, maybe her wedding wasn't everything she dreamed of so she thinks she can control your wedding to make up for what she wasn't happy about with her wedding.