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Just Said Yes March 2021

Bridal Party Sister Advice

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Mary, on September 13, 2019 at 7:33 PM

I recently got engaged. My sister was married this past June and made me her MOH. She said I was the closest girl to her in her life. Which was super sweet, although I thought she had a lot of close girl friends her age (she is 5 years older than me). Anyways, I don't really feel that close to my sister. I love her as a sister and appreciate all she has done for me (allowed me to live in her basement for hecka cheap), but I don't see her in my wedding party. I see just my three best friends and my fiance's sister-in-law who I have been getting closer to. Of course she will be included in all the wedding festivities (maybe not bachelorette depending on what we do), and she will be getting ready with my, my bridesmaids and my brothers fiance. Is okay that im not including her in my party? Any advice on how to handle any possible disappointment?

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Just Said Yes March 2021
Mary · on September 16, 2019 at 1:46 PM
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The issue has been resulted, but I think this brings up a great question. Why are there so many expectations, especially around females, as to who must be in a wedding party? I mean, I had not even met my FH when I was told I was the MOH. So I understand that maybe I shouldn't have accepted if I didn't imagine her in mine, but that wasn't even a thought I had yet.

Additionally, my FHs sister I know will also be expecting to be in the bridal party because his brother's wife asked her when they got married, and will 100% make snarky comments about not being in it, but I barely know her, she's very self absorbed and basically ruined the wife's bachelorette bc she wanted to control everything (she was not MOH). And maybe that expectation is more of a her thing.

If the wedding is supposed to be all about the bride and groom, why are the so many expectations to appease other people?

Just curious.
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Super July 2019
MD · on September 16, 2019 at 4:06 PM
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I don't have a sister, but if I did, I would take it as a huge slap in the face if I asked her to be my MOH and she didn't even ask me to be a bridesmaid. Yes the marriage is just about the two of you, but the wedding involves everyone else you include to watch you get married. If you really didn't care about it, you wouldn't have a wedding party, or even a wedding.
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