Bridal Party's Duties?

To show up on time.

For me it’s the dress, the same color shoes, and throw the bachelorette party. I know some of my bridesmaids are helping out with my bridal shower as well.

Be emotionally supportive to the couple, buy attire and accessories, stand up on the wedding day with the couple, cover own travel expenses.


The wedding party typically hosts pre-wedding activities (bridesmaids host the shower and bachelorette, groomsmen host the bachelor party). Usually there is at least one seasoned member on each side with prior experience. But they are not required.
Beyond that, have fun and enjoy the party.
Anything more than that is something they have chosen on their own to help out with and is 100% optional. Thus it should be accepted graciously without complaint..and many thank yous given in return.

I 100% agree. All these crazy things I see brides on here expecting of their wedding parties is completely over the top (and sometimes just rude). These are supposed to be honored guests at your wedding; yet I see so many people doing anything but honoring them. They are not party planners (or party financiers), they are not employees, and they are not props for your weddings/photos. If someone offers to do extras then that’s fine; but it should never be expected of them. I don’t expect anything out of my bridal party other than showing up on time on the day of my wedding, in the dress they chose. And to have a blast on my dime!!

For me it’s to be supportive & bounce ideas off of- just because I think it’s a good idea doesn't mean it is! As far as the dress, the only thing I specified was the color & length, they chose style; the shoes I want the same color but my ladies can decide on style. My sister is my MOH & I told her what I wanted as far as bachelorette party & she planned/booked the rest. I just want my ladies to enjoy this & don’t feel pressured into anything.

Buy a dress in the color I chose, stand next to me at the ceremony, fix my train when I get to the end of the aisle, hold my bouquet, smile for photos.

To attend the wedding and wear an outfit that I'm okay with.

Wear the attire the couple decides upon, throw a bachelor/ette party, throw a shower, be someone to bounce ideas off during the planning process.


Yes...I am one of those people who thinks throwing the parties is part of being in the bridal party. They don't have to be huge, elaborate affairs, but if you're close enough to be in the wedding party you should want to celebrate your friend/relative.

I agree! But my bridesmaids and moh so far has been amazing. They have been listening to me talk about the wedding daily! 😫🥴 & purchasing their stuff on time.

Technically all they have to do is buy/wear the dress we chose to the wedding. Stand there and smile and hopefully not look crazy lol. However as a former bridesmaid I have put in a lot of time, money, energy, and support to my girls on their special day. I don’t regret it one bit. So now as a bride I hope I can receive small celebrations ( bridal shower & bachelorette party) with them. I don’t want them to brake bank or be stressed over it. I just want to party and celebrate with my girls....and mimosas lol 🍾

View Quoted Comment I’ve got the same mindset as this too. I know Everyone says showers and bachelorettes or pre wedding events overall are optional but I think it would be nice to do something to celebrate their milestone. I definitely threw a shower and bachelorette day for my bride when I was MOH.

I am traditional, think that bridesmaids need to be at the rehearsal if they can, and show at the wedding groomed and dressed, 1/2 hour to an hour before pictures. Anything else they volunteer to do is a bonus, planning showers or luncheons. Bachelorettes were not even part of most weddings 20 years ago, except as an alternative to showers or a luncheon, and when held, were an evening. Yet many talk of one that lasts a day or a weekend as a minimum for BM, and I strongly disagree. For my wedding, and for more than half I have been to, inc. way out of my home area, other friends or family did all of shower or bach planning, or maybe did it with a single bm . And at least 1 shower was MOG involved. I prefer it when folks do not have a lot of money, to see expenses spread out, not to have the same few WP do shower or luncheon, and bachelorette. Some people have very few friends and family, so there are few guests at each party, and it is not a burden for BM. But it should be an honor, and not take over a limited amount of their time. I wish more people waited til the traditional 9 months, or even 6 months, before picking bridesmaids. Save the seemingly endless numbers of bridal party troubles. And not have brides get more than 1 nice personal gift given close to the wedding. I wish the endless stream of gifts, proposal, and personalized items at shower or bachelorette, and robes or shirts or spa days, would disappear. They did not exist 15 years ago before Reality TV and website weddings. And I think they are pressure on BM, a feeling of indebtedness, that they ought to do more than they have time or money for. And they give many brides a sense, I did this, and that, and the other gifts, now she (BM) ought to do what I want in everything. They wreck the dynamics of many wedding parties, and I wish people would stop. If you have to buy friendship, something is wrong. There is no team wedding, and BM are not a long term support system for brides, beyond their ordinary friendship. YUP, that about covers it.

Wear the color asked of them, show up on time.

Now, I also think you shouldn't ask anyone you don't have a tight bond with, because it's a financial ask.

So, I ended up with seriously supportive BMs and a bridesman, who threw us a FANTASTIC wedding shower, made sure I had a fun bachelorette (and I don't drink), plus a bonus joint baseball game for DH and myself, and helped me not murder anyone when our ceremony plans fell apart 3 1/2 months before the wedding. AND were very much there for me when my entire family disowned me over the invites.

But honestly all I asked was for them to wear purple, show up at the rehearsal and on the wedding day, for my MOH to hold my flowers and one of my BMs to read a sonnet.

Support me through the wedding planning process, wear the color I asked of them, stick to the schedule day-of, and just have fun with me!

Definitely ask those that are closest to you that you would want to stand by you on your big day. People who are supportive, and always have your back! I'm lucky to have girls that all know one another, so we already had each other's numbers so we started a group message to keep everything in one place. They all agreed on the same price point, loved the website that I want their dresses to be purchased at, and my MOH is already planning our couple's shower!

I'm with you. Bridal party duties include:

1) Pick out a dress or jumpsuit that fits within the guidelines I've set for the bridal party and put some effort into looking nice for my day. That means make an effort to style your hair, don't look like you just rolled out of bed or are obviously hung over, etc.

2) Show up for my wedding, early, at the time I ask, and know what is expected of you during the ceremony. That probably means you come to my rehearsal too.

3) Generally be somewhat helpful to me during the day, including help me with my dress, hold my bouquet, tell me if my underwear is showing, etc.

4) Be in some posed/coordinated photos.

5) Be willing to let me talk about the wedding and bounce some ideas off of you leading up to the wedding. You don't need to be my personal event coordinator or styling consultant, have intimate knowledge of everything wedding related, or tolerate every conversation we have being entirely about my wedding, but if I reach out to you to ask your opinion on something specific (likely something you are already know a lot about or I really value your opinion on) please be willing to entertain that conversation.

I do feel every bride should have a conversation with bridesmaids about expectations prior to the bridesmaids committing to being in the wedding. I think bridesmaids proposals put people on the spot and allow people to get caught up in the moment without understanding what each expects from the other. If a bride wants to specify an exact dress, shoes and accessories, wants the girls to get hair and makeup done, wants a shower and bachelorette, expects maids to help with various aspects of the wedding like designing centerpieces, addressing envelopes, etc, and pay their way to a destination wedding, then any/all of that needs to be communicated before the maids commit to being in the wedding, not after they've said yes. The only universal "given" is that the maid shows up the day of and wears a dress/outfit the bride has chosen.

There are no universal duties or requirements, only those that the people getting married expect. For me, the only true requirement is supporting me as I begin my marriage, & making sure I look decent throughout the night xD I was very upfront in that I would need advice & help, as I’m an anxious person generally & wedding planning is a lot for me! I’ve told my best woman that she may have to do a venue run through to check decor, & I may ask one of them to take cards & gifts. I’ll probably pick outfits but it’s not the end of the world if something happens & one or more can’t wear it. Same with pre-wedding parties—they aren’t necessary, but if someone wants to plan something I would appreciate the time & effort they put into it!