Bridal Shower, Divorced Parents, New Girlfriend

I would ask your FMIL how she feels about it. She's co-hosting a shower, so I wouldn't even consider inviting the new girlfriend if she's uncomfortable with it. I'm sure that if she doesn't receive an invite, the girlfriend and FFIL would both be understanding.

As someone in a family of a million divorces, I would suggest not inviting her. If you feel weird have your fiancé or fsil talk to the dad. Tell him it’s nothing against her but we want the fmil to be as comfortable as possible especially since she’s hosting it. I can tell you from experience it’s not a good time to try to break down walls. My mom is trying to be nice about my bridal shower but she’s getting madder by the second and now i am dreading it. And my parents have been divorced over 20 years so this stuff definitely shouldn’t matter.

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I agree with this. Hopefully, your FMIL will be okay with inviting her. Maybe the new gf won't want to come.

I would have your FSIL talk to her mother about it. Basically like we are on good terms with this woman and are you okay with her coming.

If your FMIL is co hosting the shower I wouldn’t invite her. I would have a friendly conversation with your FFIL and the girlfriend and just explain it to them... I’m sure they will understand. The girlfriend may also not even want to go to something hosted by her new boyfriends ex-wife.