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Beginner May 2022

Bridal Shower Etiquette

Ceb, on December 1, 2021 at 10:50 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 6

My sister is starting to plan my bridal shower, but I'm not sure who should be invited on my fiancé's side. His ENTIRE family lives out of state, like, not a single family member here. Should I go ahead and send them an invite, or is that too much of a gift grab?

Additionally, if I do invite out of state women, should I invite them all? My fiancé has three female cousins he's very close with and two female cousins he's not nearly as close with that I'd feel odd about sending invites to. What's the etiquette here?

Finally, I only have about 10-12 people in my state that might come, and I'm feeling a little awkward/embarrassed about it. What are some fun ideas to help a small shower feel big? One of my bridesmaids had multiple 50+ people showers, so I guess I'm just feeling insecure.

Thanks in advance!



6 Comments

Latest activity by Ceb, on December 2, 2021 at 7:35 PM
  • W
    VIP September 2020
    Willow ·
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    Only invite local guests that you are individually close to. A 10 to 12 person shower is perfect. A 50 person shower is the size of a small wedding


    A shower is an extra party where the guest is to get you an extra gift. You're supposed to keep it limited to people extra close to you
    A tea party would be perfect for 10 to 12 people
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  • Janet
    Expert October 2018
    Janet ·
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    I would keep it to your inner circle of those that you talk to and see on a regular basis. There is no harm in inviting those out of state if you truly want them there, but a 50 person shower is going to be very expensive on the hosts. anything 20 or less IMO is perfect

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Showers are supposed to be the bride's inner circle. They are not supposed to be every single woman on the wedding guest list. I had about 25-30 at mine mostly because my husband's parents' friend group has this thing where they invite each other to their kids showers, so while I felt awkward about it, their friends are very nice and they would actually feel snubbed if they didn't get an invite. Without that group, I would have had about 12-15 people lol. Smaller showers are the norm, so don't feel like you're doing something wrong!
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  • S
    Super September 2022
    Sarah ·
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    It’s really up to you and your fiancé who you want to invite. You don’t have to invite every female invited to the wedding. Also consider asking your sister how many guests she’s comfortable hosting. 10-12 is a great number for an intimate shower. Then you can actually talk and spend time with every guest.


    Both of our moms want to invite pretty much everyone so they are each just planning one themselves. I told them if that’s what they want then go for it, I just know I want my friends there.

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  • Ashlee
    Super September 2022
    Ashlee ·
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    I'm from a different state than I currently live. My FH's family is all where I live now. So I'm having a small brunch shower in my home state (asking people to ship gifts and include a picture of the item in a card, so that I don't have to figure out how to get them home), and then my FMIL is throwing one here with my friends here and FH's family.

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  • C
    Beginner May 2022
    Ceb ·
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    Thank you for the comments, everyone! I'm feeling much better about everything now. Smiley smile

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