Bridal shower stress

Honestly I wish I pushed harder for no bridal shower but my mom really wanted to throw it for me so I gave in and it's scheduled for February. I have a bunch of out of state BMs and they've already booked flights. The stress of knowing how much money people are spending on me has been giving me anxiety, even though none of these pre wedding festivities are required and if they couldn't financially do it then they wouldn't have. It's really sweet that she wants to throw you a bridal shower, but if it's stressing you out, I'd say to not have one. Just let her know how you're feeling.

Is there another holiday you can move it to? Maybe farther out? I totally get it as I am also 10 hours from where I grew up. Is it the timing that's stressing you out, or the party itself? If it's the party itself, maybe you should push to not have one. But if it's just the timing, maybe try being more firm about the times you are available. It's perfectly reasonable to not want to make the whole trip there and take off work etc for one event and your MOH should respect that and plan accordingly, even if it means moving the shower out a little. I think that's how I would/will play it (because I might be in the same situation at some point lol.)

I traveled for my shower. It was more important to my family than to me, but it was worth it.

I’m hoping it will work out to have a “shower” a day or two before the wedding since so many people are out of state and out of country! If I were to fly to each pocket of people in my life I’d be out of pto and money before I finished! I’m hoping it will be more of a thanks for being part of my life and for coming party rather than a play games and open presents event since it will be days before the wedding and I’d never expect two (or any) gift. If it’s the symbolism and effort that counts then I’m hoping it will work! Good luck!

This sounds stressful. All of my people are local and I have declined a bridal shower - this would give me too much anxiety. Maybe talk to your MOH about how you are feeling - I get that you don't want to hurt her feelings and it seems like you would only be doing this so she doesn't get upset, but your feelings matter too. If the dates you feel most comfortable going don't work for her, then that is something you should all discuss. My guess is that she doesn't want to have you feel anxious and miserable.