Bridemaids or Not

If you don't want to have a wedding party, that is absolutely your prerogative! I don't see any situation here at all. If your friends ask, just say you decided a wedding party didn't fit into your vision, and you just want everyone to attend as guests without any obligations. Don't worry about flowers or hairpieces, proposals, etc. - that is just going to make things more confusing. Your friends will still be your friends and give you support and love - I think you are worried over nothing.

As long as you have a legal witness for the marriage certificate, do whatever you want. I am a bit confused about sister in law carrying a bouquet. What is the purpose of that if you aren’t having bridesmaids? Because your guests will wonder why she isn’t standing up as a bridesmaid. Skip the bouquet for her.

Bridesmaid proposals are not a thing in most circles outside of the wedding industry pressuring brides to spend more money. If you were having bridesmaids, you would ask them over coffee or on the phone.

I would skip the hair pieces as well. That isn’t really a thank you gift.

I would get family corsages, not bouquets if you want to recognize them. Otherwise just invite everyone as guests - you dont' need anyone to stand up with you if you dont' want to. I would feel weird being asked to be "kind of' a bridesmaid which is what it seems like you're asking of your friends? I guess i'm confused a little. But overall, just ask them or don't - either way is fine!

Alright,

So bouquets are reserved for your bridesmaids and yourself. Usually mothers get corsages along with grandmothers. Boutonnieres go to groom, groomsman fathers and grandfathers - you could give boutonnieres to brothers and sister corsages as well but thats not necessary. Everything I listed is unnecessary.

If your "bridesmaids" aren't standing up with you and you aren't requiring them to wear anything specific I would hardly call them a bridesmaid. You don't have to have a label for you friends, you can still have a "bachelorette" party with your friends but don't expect them to pay/plan it - that might be on you to do.

TBH I would just ask your friends to be bridesmaids! It sounds like you want to honor them with the role, but are worried about the short timeframe, correct? You can set the expectation with them from the get-go that all you want is a bachelorette night and for your maid of honor to give a speech. 4 months is still plenty of time for them to buy a dress (heck, my wedding is 9/3 and my MOH still hasn't ordered hers), especially if you allow them to get any dress that fits certain specifications (same or similar color, same length). If you don't want them standing at the alter with you, you can have them sit in the first row. A fancy bridesmaid proposal isn't necessary (a card and picture is perfect) and a thank you gift at the rehearsal is good.

I'd do bouquets for yourself and if you decide to have bridesmaids; boutonnieres for groom, groomsmen, and fathers (and grandfathers if you want); and corsages for moms (and grandmothers if you want). I'd skip the bouquet for your FSIL unless you ask her to be a bridesmaid - if you really want to give her something, I'd go corsage.

If I were your friends, I would be very confused if you gave me something that said I'm like a bridesmaid, but not actually a bridesmaid or had to explain to me what you actually wanted me to do. If anything, I think that would cause more stress and drama. From what you've said it sounds like you'd want them to be bridesmaids, but you are worried about the time. Honestly, I think four months is totally doable. With online shopping it makes it super easy to find dresses in a short amount of time. The same thing goes for if your fiancé wants to have groomsmen. There are tons of online options for bridesmaid dresses including Azazie, Kennedy Blue, Cocomelody, Revelry , and Birdy Grey I would also recommend checking out Black Tux or Generation Tux if your fiancé decides he wants to have groomsmen. Heck you could even check out Amazon. I've gotten some really nice outfits and shoes from Amazon. The only thing with Amazon is that you'd want to make sure you read reviews and that there are photos of real people in them.

I would recommend having bouquets for yourself and any bridesmaids (if you decide to have a bridal party after all) and boutonnieres for your fiancé, groomsmen (if he decides to have them), and your dad and a corsage for your mom. I don't think it is necessary for your FSIL to have a bouquet or corsage unless she would be a bridesmaid.