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Courtney
Expert July 2020

Bridesmaid cost. What does a bride pay for?

Courtney, on January 20, 2020 at 6:04 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 13
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So my wedding would be considered a destination wedding for majority of my family & two of my bridesmaids (my two cousins so their traveling cost shouldn’t be much as my whole family will be carpooling from the same cities). My other bridesmaid lives two hours away and my maid of honor lives in the same city as me then I have a Jr maid of honor (my little sister who would be traveling with my mom). My wedding venue has hotel lodging so I’d like all of my bridesmaids to stay there with me the night before. The night after the wedding doesn’t matter to as I won’t be with them. What should I as a bride should pay for them and what costs should they cover? I’m mainly concerned about the cost for my 1 bridesmaid who lives 2 hours away and my two cousins who are bridesmaids. My sisters will be covered by mom. I know bridesmaids cover the cost of their dress but as far as makeup, jewelry and me wanting all of us to stay in the same hotel the night before should we all split that cost? Should I cover it? Or should my two cousins just stay with their parents (Which would be my aunt and uncle) the night before? To split the cost It would be about $40 each. There’s also makeup. Which is $325 total for me day of, trial run and 5 bridesmaids (so I’d do myself, MOH, 3 bridesmaids and either my Jr maid of honor or my mother). I know this is long but basically my question is am I obligated to cover their lodging since they’re traveling far or, ask them to split the price for us to stay together or have my cousins stay with their parents & the night before and I make another arrangement for my bridesmaid who isn’t family. And do I cover their makeup and jewelry?

13 Comments

Latest activity by Julie, on January 22, 2020 at 10:59 AM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    If you’re requiring them to stay at the hotel, you should pay. If they choose to stay there on their own, they can split the cost. As far as accessories and hair and makeup, it’s the same concept. Anything you require, you pay for. If they’re choosing their own accessories and have the option to get their hair and makeup done by a professional, they pay.
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney ·
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    Okay thank you. I also forgot to mention they aren’t helping with any costs for bridal shower. My mom and her friend are covering that. I don’t plan on having any huge bachelorette trip maybe just an activity. That’s what made me wonder about costs because so far I’m not asking for much, just the dress. I didn’t think about lodging cost until now but was previously planning on paying for their makeup. For jewelry do I just tell them the color so they can all purchase their own in that color if I’m not paying for that?
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    They aren’t required to throw you parties or pay for them. Giving them a color for jewelry or shoes would be completely fine.
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney ·
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    Thanks! I just wanted to double check since I’ve been reading different things.
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  • Cassandra7
    Super August 2006
    Cassandra7 ·
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    They pay for their dresses. Anything else you require you pay for.

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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney ·
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    Thanks! I’ll just factor it into the budget.
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  • mrswinteriscoming
    VIP December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
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    I think the bridal party should pay for what is reasonable - i.e. dress, shoes etc, however re the hotel and hair and makeup, I think it's definitely on the bride.

    If anyone in the bridal party wants anything beyond what you're providing, then they should pay for it themselves.

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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    Anything you are requiring them to do, you should pay for. Anything that is optional, having their nails done, jewelry they want etc, they pay for.

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    If you require them to stay at a specific hotel, you should pay for it. We had two blocked hotels & didn't care where the wedding party stayed, so we didn't pay for it. If hair & makeup is required (either a specific style or professional), you have to pay for it. If it's optional to get it done professionally and they can do their own style, they can pay for it if they want. We paid for all bridesmaids & moms to get their hair and makeup done, but they did whatever style and look they felt best in. Same for jewelry & shoes. We didn't require any style, so they wore whatever they wanted. I think if bridesmaids are in long dresses, it's actually dumb to request specific shoes since no one sees them ever. Basically anything you dictate or require is financially on you.

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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney ·
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    Okay thank you. They will be wearing long dresses so I’m not requiring any specific shoes, just maybe a neutral color. I do plan to pay for the makeup if they want it. I’ll probably give them the option, and we will just factor in the hotel stay if it’s in our budget.
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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    I didn't require any shoe at all and it looked great. I didn't even require a color. I knew the girls were adults and could pick shoes that looked good. Then they were more comfy, felt prettier & more themselves. I would make it an option because I bet most girls will plan on staying in the hotel anyway.

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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney ·
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    That makes sense! I do want them to be comfortable and the wedding is in the summer so they can wear sandals, and I wouldn’t mind. And yeah if we didn’t all stay together, they would probably just stay with our family members. I think staying all together would make it easier on my bridesmaid who’s not family because she’d have less to pay for. It would be more convenient for her.
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  • Julie
    Dedicated February 2020
    Julie ·
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    You pay for whatever you are requiring them to do. It sounds like staying in the hotel with you in optional, so I would say no need to pay for that.

    If you are requiring specific hair, makeup, etc., then you pay for it. If you're fine with them doing as they want, then no need.

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