Bridesmaid Meeting

HOLD UP. You have to-do lists for them? Have you even given the proposal boxes yet? If not then they haven't accepted to be a bridesmaid first of all so you shouldn't throw this at them yet. Or ever for that matter. Second of all, bridesmaids don't have a TO DO LIST! Bridesmaids have to get a dress and show up. That's it. There's nothing more that they are required to do. You do not give them prices. You ask them all individually when you are not in a group what their budgets are and make sure you stay in those budgets, or let them pick their own dress. Unless you are paying for their hair, they are not required to get their hair done. You do not give them hair prices for that reason. And PAYMENT PLANS?! What could you possibly be proposing they have a payment plan for?!?!

Also it's way too early for you to be doing any of this. Your wedding is a year away...

It's not that we aren't giving you advice. We are trying to give you advice to avoid putting yourself in a disaster. Honestly just trying to help here. But take a step back and think about this.

Marquita, you're not going to have many friends after this. I would laugh in your face and keep walking.

Aren't these women those that you treasure having in your life? Did you ask what they afford? I don't understand why you want to treat someone you care about like an employee. Yes, it's your wedding but guess what, sweetheart, no one cares about your wedding as much as you do. Bridesmaids included. I'd recommend holding off on your plans for the meeting, go out and grab some wine and just have a good afternoon. Then reevaluate everything you've done so far.

You're a peach.

The only meeting we had was the day we all went shopping together and they got to pick out a dress they could afford and felt beautiful in. Then we drank. Meeting adjourned.

They don't have to get hair/makeup or nails done. It's not required. You can more than certainly ask if they would LIKE to, but with your "I'll kick them out of the wedding" attitude, it sounds like you are forcing them.

I wouldn't call it a meeting. I'm hosting a relaxed brunch for my bridesmaids so they can get to know each other a bit. My hope is we are too drunk off bellinis to actually talk about wedding stuff. So more of a girls' day. No pressure.

Your wedding is a year away. Relax a little bit.

You seem like such a gem.

Umm I think the main thing to discuss is their budget. I actually just went to brunch with my bridesmaids last weekend and that's pretty much what we discussed along with dress styles that everyone liked. And then we just gossiped while enjoying mimosas ! I'm sorry that everyone gave you a hard time on this thread, I understand what you meant about a meeting. I'm sure your girls already know and are happy to get their nails and shoes and don't feel "required". Good luck!

We didn't have a meeting. We have an ongoing group chat on fb gor all the GM and BM and a Google doc of the timeline and who should be doing what when. Also, all the contact info is in the Google doc so if anyone needs to get ahold of someone the day of, they can.

My maids will be picking their own style and dresses just same color I'm doing a vote , but I like I said before my post was for advice for ones who have had a meeting && exactly I'm throwing information out there that would be required and if they deny anything that's when they would say no to the proposal

So you're literally having a meeting to say "I want you to be my bridesmaid. This is the exact way shit is gonna go down. If you won't 100% commit to my entitled demands as the bride, say no". sounds like a really fun time.

Many brides on this site just enjoy being disagreeable--you can ignore them.

To answer your question, your current plan sounds fine. I would suggest not assigning them tasks since they each have different skills, interests, and schedules. So you can ask them to volunteer for things instead.

Your wedding is very far away, so you can wait to give them the nitty gritty details about the wedding week. It's overwhelming and they will probably forget. Instead, start with a grand overview and tell them what is needed for the next 2 months. Then schedule another meeting or email blast in 2 months, and so on.

Some good to-dos for now: start looking at bridesmaid dress ideas, find venues to book tours, collect addresses of guests, brainstorm wedding detail ideas.

I think a meeting is a great way to make sure there are no unstated assumptions. After all, they can't read your mind!

For overall ease of planning, it might be best to give them a little leeway on the minor details (ex: light colored solid nail polish and braided updo, but don't specify the exact salon and style). That way, they can get your items done on their own time and in their budget. That will increase compliance and minimize issues later.

I think the thing you're missing, Marquita, is that normal, non-bridezillas do not have these kind of meetings.

Eta: so you're saying that the look you're going for is way more important than who is up there with you? Are you going to make them buy their own glitter too? #glittercoveredslaves

Sooooooo, your BMs are employees going through a job interview?

Marquita. Nails and hair and makeup are not required. Don't make them accept a terms and conditions for being your bridesmaid, it's a goddamn honor, you're not hiring employees.

Don't listen to @Ash7898. Your bridesmaids are not your employees.

@ash so you agree that if your bridesmaids don't want or can't afford to get their hair done, you'll kick them out of your wedding?

In the meeting everyone will meet eachother and give me feed back on everything I'm not forcing anyone to do anything I think some of y'all don't understand what I'm doing point blank period

I was forced to do to bridesmaids meetings a few years ago. We then threw a great shower and bachelorette party. We visited the venue and went dress shopping several times.

We were slaves.

The bride deemed our parties not good enough and we were fired. All of us. We never got a thank you, but the guests did.

None of us are friends with the bride anymore.

Get up, dress up, show up- these are the rules. The MOH can also hold your flowers during the ceremony, and fluff your dress. That's about it. If you make demands you won't have them as friends after this.

Listen to Deb!

Are you @MeanQueenNina on a different username??