Bridesmaid Proposal ...event ideas

I gave my girls boxes with balloons in them to pop. My girls were asked in July and my wedding is in July.

Haha, pole dancing sounds really fun but might be kind of a hard way for people to get to know each other as they will probably be kind of shy!

I think you would be safer with a spa day or nice dinner. I don't know that photos would be necessary, but if you really want them I would say pictures for sure over video.

I just put together bags for the bridesmaids with a card, nail polish in my wedding color, and ring pops. For my MOH I ordered a wine glass that has her name on it and "will you be my maid of honor?" in her favorite color and also gave her nail polish and a ring pop. You don't have to do anything elaborate even a simple card will work!

What about a paint night? Then everyone also has a memento of the night.

Deegee723 ...I have boxes too but I just didn't want it to be impersonal. This is why I decided to do an event. I want to propose to them no later than December 1st.

Caitlyn ...funny thing is, I asked all the girls if I gave an event which would they prefer? They all said either one would do but if they had to choose pole dancing except one. The odd one out said pole dancing. None of these girls are shy which is why I know it would be an interesting event to attend. Not to mention fun! Besides these ladies always invite me to things but I am a work-a-holic, so I want to let them know that I appreciate them.

FutureMrs.C ...I have boxes and I just want them to feel as special as they make me feel.

Kimi ...that is a great idea. I will definitely check into the price of that.

Thanks ladies for your responses!!! I really appreciate it.

I think that the whole "BP proposal" thing is turning in to way to big of a deal. Why does everything have to be an event? I think taking them out to dinner and asking with a nice card would definitely be special enough. Not everything has to be a spectical. December sounds like a good time, not too far out but close enough to give everyone time to prepare. Dinner or I also like the painting class idea, or a cooking class could be fun!

SwoleMates2016 ...true it is getting too big. The BP Proposal is getting to be bigger than the actual wedding in a way. I just want to do something special because I have stood them up a number of times but I will add dinner and cooking class to my list. Thanks again for your response.

@Nydia - I love the idea of a girls get-together in general, since it will be a nice day/evening for you all. Why would you wait until the end of the day to ask them to be in your bridal party? Do you all often hang out together, or do you think it will be obvious what is going on? it might be nice to get the 'asking' done in the beginning, so that everyone can relax and enjoy the activity .

If it were me, I would ask them individually beforehand so they don't feel pressured to say yes to your proposal in a group setting. Then I would invite them all to whatever meet and greet event you choose after your bridal party is finalized. The proposals are cute and I think the down on bended knee thing is adorable (I "proposed" this way to our officiant who is a very close friend..."will you marry us?"), but it's a lot harder for people to say no in a group setting.

Another bride posted a thread earlier about her best friend telling her she couldn't even attend her wedding, let alone be in the bridal party. So I would tread lightly even if you feel sure they'll all say yes. You never know.

Whew. Okay, after all that, I would be STOKED to be invited to a pole dance class. They are so fun. A cooking class would be fun, too. However, if the idea is to get to know each other, anything instructional will make general conversation more difficult since you need to pay at least a little bit of attention to the instructor. Just do drinks and dinner or a game night or something. It's really sweet that you want to show your appreciation.

I'm going to emphasize what previous posters have said. Please ask them individually and without a ton of production, you don't want to put undue pressure on them.

I agree with Swolemates about proposing to bms getting to be too big of a thing. I just asked mine either in person or on the phone. I do think it's sweet that you want to host something, since you often don't get to hang out with them as much as you would like. I do agree that asking privately might be better in case they say no. Maybe you could give them the boxes before the event and then take them out to dinner or to a paint night or cooking class or something a week or two later. I definitely think hiring a photographer or videographer is over the top.

I agree with Swolemates and RJmargo. It doesn't have to be a big thing. I sent my girls a silly snapchat with funny faces to ask them. They responded via snapchat. You should always ask individually, in case someone says no.

I think the whole "proposal" thing is ridiculous myself. Yes, you're excited you're getting married, and people will be happy for you, but people are nowhere near as excited as you are. The bride is putting way too much thought and money into a simple thing....probably way more than the groom did when he actually proposed marriage! Just ask them.

And also....is it a wonder so many brides have issues down the road with their BP? You put people on the spot to say yes. What if they don't want to do it? How can they say no when you've made such a huge production of it?

You know what you do....save that money, lessen their financial burden and buy their dress for them.

Your BM proposal sounds more in depth than my FH's wedding proposal! Like a few of the others, I think the BM proposal event is just another wedding industry creation to take more of our money. Just ask. Individually.

I know you're very excited to ask them. I was too! But I wouldn't do this. Imagine the pressure you're putting on your girls to say yes. I would do something one on one that is more personal. There is no need to go this over the top.

I agree with others who say they should be individually asked, not as a group. Maybe a few months down the road you can host an event like this for them to get to know each other better.

Thanks again everyone for the advice. I will take all of your advice and do it individually then host an event for the girls who accept.

I also had a close friend that I thought for sure would say “yes” but didn't. I am very happy that I created an event brite proposal and accepting the meet and greet brunch date accepted the proposal. I plan to give out bags at the event and discuss dates and expectations. I am trying to find a fun quick activity to do at brunch so they can begin to get to know each other.