Sunday was our 6 month mark, and yesterday I was all kinds of productive...scheduled cake tasting, made flower deposit, working with HMUA, figured out some officiant stuff, etc, and was really happy with what I had gotten done. Then overnight, I got an email from one of my bridesmaids saying that she can't be in the wedding. That she was so happy and honored that I asked her, but that she has so much going on right now and she's so stressed that she feels like she can't give me/the wedding the attention it deserves and she doesn't want to be a source of stress for me.
I am sad, frustrated, disappointed. But the thing is, I read her email at 4 AM because I had been lying awake half the night, thinking among other things about how to talk to her about the wedding, because I was getting a feeling this was happening. My sister (MOH) asked me over the weekend if this bridesmaid was still into it because she hadn't responded to any emails/texts. We work together, and I don't like to talk too much about the wedding in the office because so many people aren't invited, but she was getting weird every time I even mentioned wedding stuff and practically starting to avoid me.
It's definitely a busy time at work, for both of us. She's busy at home with husband and 2 kids, just like my other 2 girls. I know she's also dealing with some kind of plumbing nightmare in her condo that they can't get resolution on. But I haven't asked the girls to do much, and didn't really plan to. We went looking at dresses one day over the summer, and are at that point now where we need to place the orders. My MOH is organizing a shower as a surprise so I'm not involved in that, but knowing my sister she's not super intense about it. I'm trying not to let the wedding consume me, I certainly don't want it to be a pain for anyone else.
I can't figure out what to do next. When I told FH this morning, he was supportive and said he knows its fine if the sides are unbalanced...and then made a suggestion for moving the guys around so it could be balanced again. Do I fill in the spot? There was one more friend on my short list who I didn't ask, partly to keep this silly balance, and partly because I feel like she's in weddings all the time and I didn't want to be just one more thing for her to do. But she's the one who keeps offering advice and referrals and wants to help arrange centerpieces and tie ribbons on favors. Since I didn't really sleep last night, I feel like I shouldn't do anything right now, till I can think more clearly.
Sorry for the rambling...I need more sleep so I can think...
