Bridesmaid won't buy her dress and the window of opportunity is closing. Sos!

You don't get a say on what she chooses to spend her money on. The only thing you have control over is letting it stress you out. If she doesn't have a dress, the can just be a guest and not part of the bridal party. That will be on her. You still have a wonderful day to get ready for without worrying about what other people are doing. Yes, it sucks but you gotta let it go!

I agree with everyone. This is her choice, and if she doesn't get the dress then she can be a guest. Because of her poor financial decisions, I would not pay for the dress. It would be one thing to pay for it if an emergency arose, or she's tight on finances for important reasons. But it seems that her tight financial situation is her own fault. I would give her the due date for the dress and if she doesn't have it, then she can be a guest. Bridesmaids are supposed to make the wedding process less stressful, not more.

I am so sorry that you're going through this, especially with what is suppossed to be your BFF. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it looks like it's time to cut your loses and move on from this person. She is NOT "for" you. I don't know what she's going through something, but her behavior toward you and your wedding is more than a bit passive aggressive. She clearly has no desire, or intention, to be a part of your wedding, no does she seem to care that she won't be. People make time, and money, for what they want to make time and money for and after all this time, if she hasb;t made ANY effort to order her dress, there's nothing to suggest that will change anytime soon. I understand not being confrontational, but it might be time to have a conversation with her. Not a text, or even a phone call, but a face to face conversation. Tell her what you're seeing and how you're feeling about it. Give her the opportunity to tell you what's going on with her that makes her behave this way, if she's willing to. Tell her that you don't think that she all in on your wedding and for that reason, you're asking her to step back. If you want her still there as a guest, let her know that, you'd be happy to see her face there in the crowd if that's all she can manage. I'm not saying to write off your friendship completely -- unless that's what you really want -- but leave that be until after your wedding. you have enough to deal without without this drama. After your wedding, you can reevaluate whether or not the friendship is salvageable or even worth it. But that's a situatuon for AFTER your wedding.

Good luck and I hope things work out.

"She just resorts to tears when she's asked about it or offered solutions or budgeting assistance."

She resorts to it because it works. Your friend is in need of a wake-up call. And I say that as someone who was also very wasteful and lazy for much of my youth. You know how long she's going to keep behaving like this? Forever, as long as she's enabled to. Why actually put the effort in if she knows she can do nothing and still get all the perks?

Bottom line, she's not a bridesmaid anymore. She's not being a good friend, and on some level she knows it. She's just counting on you feeling too scared to ever confront her on it. She expects you to give in and buy the dress. Whatever you do, don't do that. We had difficulties with a groomsmen to the point where my fiance finally had to talk to them and ask them straight up if they were even going to be there at the wedding, let alone do all the things they were supposed to do based on their role. It wasn't an easy conversation, but this person finally said that they didn't think they could do it, and we all moved on from there. And you know what? It was a HUGE relief for me and my partner.

Talk with your friend, and prepare yourself for the emotional manipulation. Don't let the tears, angsting, or misdirection leave you discombobulated. You don't have to be harsh, just be direct and neutral emotionally. "Friend, it's very clear that you have no intention of being a bridesmaid. I think it's best if you attend the wedding as a guest." No room for arguing, no more "I swear I'll do it this weekend!", just finito. She'll be hurt, but she'll mostly be wrestling with having to admit to herself that maybe she needs to get her life in order.

I totally get it. My best friend is doing the same thing to me. She is the only one who hasn't gotten her dress and yes davids bridal is saying March for my May too. The dress on sale right now and she still doesn't have the money. She always looks great and dresses very well since high school. She is broke though when I really need her. I will not pay for her either. So I'll pressure her a lil more. She will get the dress. I just need her to step up and do it.

I would say buy the dress for her but it doesn't seem like she is putting any effort at all to at least communicate to you whats going on. Resorting to tears seems like manipulation. Its different if she is tearful and says hey I really want to be in your wedding, I don't have the money right now can you help me. It seems like she just keeps on making excuses. I would let her come as a guest and save the headache.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I've had similar trouble with a bridesmaid and attempted to talk it through with her but ultimately told her she can go as guest. Some people won't be considerate of the position you are in as a bride to be and sometimes the people we expect the most from end up being the ones to disappoint and that SUCKS. Stand your ground and don't let her continue to steal your joy.

I'm so sorry that you are in this situation but I agree with a lot of other PP's. At the end of the day, she will either get the dress or not and it will come in time or not. If not, then she can attend as a guest even though I know this is not what you want. You should not have to purchase a dress for her either, especially if she can prioritize buying other things than your dress. If she doesn't value getting the dress on time or being your bridesmaid then good riddance. You'll be better off without her and her drama. Good luck!