I am getting married in March of 2022! My fiancé and I are very excited. We decided on a destination wedding in the Caribbean because we hate the idea of spending thousands on a wedding and hardly seeing our close friends and family who would have to travel to us anyway, as we moved out to a different state as of last year. We completely understand that this decision will ultimately lead to some people getting excluded due to finances and we are ok with the decision as this is what is best for us. This wedding is also much cheaper than what we would have had if we did it in the states!
We are both young (23 and 26) and are financially better off than our close friends that we invited to be in the wedding party. Knowing this, we have offered to pay for their travel expenses, the $400 to reserve a room on the resort and their bridesmaids dresses. We ultimately budgeted for giving each member of the wedding party around $1000. When we announced the wedding we were careful to do it as early as possible giving them a year and three months to plan ahead and save up money.
All three of my friends that are supposed to be bridesmaids agreed to be in the wedding party and said that they were excited. Three months go by with no other word about it from any of the three. I reached out to point out that because of pent up travel energy from covid rooms at the resort we’re starting to book up and it was better to book a room sooner than later if they were still interested in coming. They all assured me that they are all still coming and are planning on booking their rooms soon. Another month goes by with, again, no word from any of them…. I reached out multiple times assuring them that my fiancé and I are super relaxed about this wedding and if they can’t afford it or whatever the case is it’s not going to ruin the wedding or our friendship. Again they all gave me the same response and assured me they are coming. Finally I talked to one of them individually and she said that after she got off the phone with me she was going to book her room! I was very excited and sent her the $400. No room got booked and no word about the money or the topic at all. That was 2 months ago now.
At this point a 4 day trip to an all inclusive resort that would have costed them 1000, is up to 1500 because the two cheapest rooms are booked up and the cost is only going to go up the more they wait.
I am not sure what else to do without sounding pushy! The last thing I would like is to sound like a “bridezilla” or be seen as a friend who is guilt tripping them to spend beyond their means. But I am confused because they tell me they are going and do nothing to back that up. It is to the point where it is super awkward to even bring up the wedding! These are the people who I should be talking about the wedding with, not avoiding the topic.
I’m not sure what to do at this point. Any advise would be appreciated!
