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mrsbigtexas
Dedicated December 2019

Calling in-laws "mom" and "dad"?

mrsbigtexas, on November 5, 2017 at 12:14 AM

Posted in Family and Relationships 96

My parents used to do this with my grandparents, they would call each respective in-law "mom"or "dad", but I feel like this isn't very common anymore. Does anyone do this, or plan on doing this, or is it totally weird? I love my future in-laws and wonder if this is something I should adopt or just...

My parents used to do this with my grandparents, they would call each respective in-law "mom"or "dad", but I feel like this isn't very common anymore. Does anyone do this, or plan on doing this, or is it totally weird? I love my future in-laws and wonder if this is something I should adopt or just not..

96 Comments

  • SpringBride2018
    Super April 2018
    SpringBride2018 ·
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    I will never call FIL's mom and dad. I don't feel they treat me as their own daughter. I call them by their first names.

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  • Mags
    Super July 2018
    Mags ·
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    Eeeehhh I don't think I will, but nothing wrong with it!

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  • Amanda
    Master October 2018
    Amanda ·
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    I call my fmil her name .. I don't think shed have a problem if I called her mom it's more weird for me lol .. my best friend calls my FMIL mom lol and my mom "mom" everybody's mom is mom to her .. personal preference

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  • Jennifer
    Devoted October 2017
    Jennifer ·
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    I call them by their first name and have for 11 years now. Its not going to change now that we are married. I lost my Dad 13 years ago, I wouldn't feel right calling anyone else Dad. And they have never asked me to. Smiley smile

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  • Melissa
    Expert June 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I say "hi mom" when answering the phone or in situations like that but call his mom by her first name otherwise. But over time I plan to just call her mom if that feels right. He also jokingly calls my parents mom and dad but usually by their name. I Just say do whatever feels right and be open to change.

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  • Cali_Summersunshine
    Beginner June 2016
    Cali_Summersunshine ·
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    I totally call my in-laws mom and dad. Not at first, it took a while. I was brought up to address people respectfully. When I first met my DH parents(16 years ago) I called them Mr.&Mrs. last name. They told me repeatedly to call them by their first names or mom and dad. This went on for 2 years. I finally got married to their son (14 years ago) and then felt comfortable calling them mom and dad. All of my DH siblings' spouses call them mom and dad also. My DH call my parents by their first names. They are the most kind, warm, and loving people I have ever met. I was adopted and I feel closer to my in-laws than my own parents. I feel like I got another set of parents and it just feels comfortable and natural to call them mom and dad.

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  • Jennifer
    Super May 2018
    Jennifer ·
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    I sometimes will call my FMIL "mama v" and ffil "papa v". That or by their first names. Smiley smile

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  • Rachel
    Super May 2018
    Rachel ·
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    Right now I usually call my FIL by their first names, but occasionally say "hola mama y papa" on the phone to them. They like it. I think I'm going to try to transition to saying "Mama (first name) and Papa (first name)". It's a little easier to do that, especially because I call my own parents Mom and Dad, so they aren't the same names whatsoever.

    My mom really wants FH to call her "Momma (First name)" but he's kind of shy to do that. I can't imagine him ever calling my dad something similar like that though.

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  • FutureHennigan
    Super September 2018
    FutureHennigan ·
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    No thank you. I have a mom and a dad already. Maybe if I didn't have parents of my own, I would feel differently. I call my FILs by their first names and that seems to work for everybody.

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  • Jen
    Super May 2018
    Jen ·
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    After we got engaged FMIL asked me out of the blue one day if I would start calling them mom and dad. I have a Mom and Dad already and have a wonderful relationship with them. I let FMIL know that I was uncomfortable calling anyone by my parents mom and dad. Occasionally she still pushes the subject and my FH has had to talk to her about how it makes me uncomfortable.

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  • Mozabrat
    Devoted October 2018
    Mozabrat ·
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    No, my mother in law to be and I are not close. I call her by her name.

    I have a mother and father, I couldn't imagine calling anyone else that. I know some people are comfortable with it, I am not. I call them by their first names and in every relationship I have ever had it was same way.

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  • Trish
    Devoted November 2017
    Trish ·
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    I'm on the fence about it. I would love to be able to call my in-laws mom and dad because they are my family here and my own parents are 6 hours away, but I don't want to to make my SIL feel uncomfortable. My H wouldn't care either way, but I'm not sure how SIL would feel about that.

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  • Kelly
    Devoted March 2018
    Kelly ·
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    I call my FH's mothers by their names but call his dad Pops. To me it just came out naturally. One of the moms will leave me messages saying "hey this is mom" and when I return the call I always use her name.

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  • charms88
    Savvy August 2018
    charms88 ·
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    I call my FMIL and her husband (not my FH's father & he's never been on good terms with FH so it's silly to call him anything but by his name) by their first name.

    When we have kids, that will change to Grandma/pa obviously, but otherwise I wouldn't feel comfortable calling my in-laws that.

    It's all about your preferences and comfort.
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  • O
    Master October 2017
    O ·
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    I call my MIL by her first name, and my husband calls my mom by her first name. I would never call my MIL mom because she isn't my mom, too weird for me. She's a sweet lady, but nah.
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