Can’t afford a wedding. What do we do?

Disregard what anyone tells you about YOUR wedding. It is a decision that should be made by your partner and yourself and no one else. There is nothing wrong with eloping or having a small backyard wedding! In fact, I think it would be a charming and memorable day for the both of you! Make it DIY, involve friends and loved ones who would like to participate. Weddings don't have to be a huge, lavish ordeal, they are a celebration of your love for each other and in the end, that love is what matters.

You have a couple of choices. You could wait and save up for a big wedding in a few years. You could get married now and then have a big vow renewal in a few years. You could go to the courthouse, or elope somewhere nice like a national park, a beach, basically any place that means a lot to you. You could have a micro wedding so invite parents, siblings and a couple of friends. You could still do a wedding with friends and family but do it not during meal time and just serve punch and cake for your reception - it’s much cheaper that way. There are many ways to have a cheaper wedding but it’s also pretty wonderful to elope and really focus on both of you and the love you have for each other.

It's very wise to realize that your money is better spent on living expenses and paying down debt instead of a big party. Tune out what everyone else is saying and figure out what you two can afford, then plan something special within those means. Small, inexpensive weddings can be very beautiful and meaningful (and doable!), but you will definitely need to adjust your vision from " big white wedding" to one you can afford. Good luck!

Can you afford a marriage license and officiant? Can you afford a cake from the grocery store and ask your 5-10 closest people to come over to your place? That is a wedding.

It really all depends on what you think is more important. Being married now, or all the pomp and circumstance of a wedding. A wedding is a luxury that is not required to be married. You can go get married now and in a few years when you are in a better financial situation to to a blow out vow renewal, or you have a long engagement. Neither is better than the other, but which ever you choose both of you need to agree.

If you’re both getting your Master’s then you’ll be waiting how long until you can pay down those debts and save enough money while you’re paying bills?


You could get married now and have a big vow renewal when you can afford it. There are some stunning elopement photos! Or perhaps invite immediate family only to a courthouse wedding and take them to brunch at a restaurant, if you can afford that. Or a church/temple wedding with cake & lunch refreshments in their hall afterwards. You do have a few options. Will any of those work?