Can't afford food, need to figure out reception time

Either cut down your list or only offer cake and punch.

Jeannette's idea of courthouse and then dinner sounds good too!

So relieved to see the retirement fund is off limits.

I'm sorry but on your budget your best bet is to go to the court house and take the closest maybe 8 people out to lunch after with that $600. You can't invite 80 people to your wedding if you can't even afford food or drink for them.

It sounds like you have two options - postpone the wedding to save more money to be able to host these guests, or you can elope. You and FH, and the courthouse. A courthouse wedding is still a wedding!

So much angst over what should be, and probably will be, a beautiful ceremony followed by a cake/dessert and punch reception. This couple has $600, people...in total. That's my utility bill every other month. It's not an 80 guest wedding budget, by any stretch of the imagination.

I think, OP, you wanted more from the actual wedding experience, but when your FH added names that ballooned your guest list to 80 people, it imploded. Geez, OP, don't stress yourself by trying to create what can't be created without far more money than you have (and kudos to you for not touching that 401K -- a hardship loan? He probably wouldn't even get it. Foreclosure or serious illness? Yes. A wedding? Doubt it).

You know, OP, that serving grocery store sandwiches isn't what you want to do. Seriously, do you want to fret over $2 wedding sandwich vs. the upgraded $4 wedding sandwich (plus tax)? Of course not. Who would? It's embarrassing. Do you know why? Because that is the bottom of the barrel -- a public declaration of "we invited more people than we could afford to host." Seriously, you're stressing about beverages -- alcohol, a staple at most weddings, isn't even on the table.

Can't we agree to stop with the dreams and useless advice telling this woman how to finesse a Dollar Store menu at her reception? Who the hell wants to serve grocery store sandwiches, and nothing to drink beside water (and maybe...maybe...soda), at their wedding reception? She can have a beautiful reception, and if it's cake only, some of that budget can go towards a champagne punch -- enough for everyone.

I don't think you're expecting a four hour conventional reception, OP, but you have the right to expect your guests to give you an hour or an hour and a half of their time to enjoy some dessert, champagne punch, and to speak with you and your FH before they leave. Will all 80 travel to attend a cake and punch reception? No, probably not. Oh well, more for those who do attend.

Honestly, all of this "get a tray from Costco, pot luck it, buy a used gown, it can be done (and it can't be done...unless it's a cake and punch reception) are giving this bride false hope. Let it be what it is, and what they've decided their budget can sustain -- which is a beautiful ceremony in which she looks every inch the bride, followed by an abbreviated dessert reception with a little bit of alcohol. That's it.

Do the least the best, not the best the least.

There's no shame in cutting the guest list so you can properly host. We're having a small wedding so we can splurge on better food, including apps and alcohol. Do you want the larger guest list? If you do then you have to do the 2-430 time suggested and have cake and punch. If you don't truly want all those people then stand up and say so. It's your wedding not theirs. Cut the list and have it at breakfast with all the additions like bagels and mimosas.

I totally understand wanting to have a low budget but don't let people force you to expand a guest list and then improperly host. It sounds like the close family members, including those that are ill, are the priority. Let others visit them on a different day, with their own money. It's not your responsibility to cover the cost of a huge farewell.

Uber drive, work another job...something. Unless an early afternoon wedding with short cake and punch reception, I'd feel cheated attending such a wedding without a proper meal.

People have given you timing ideas-- early afternoon, non-meal time. I would suggest 2pm.

Wait a year. So you can have everything you want.

I think having a 2pm wedding with a cake and punch reception is more than fine. You can get a nice 3 tier cake at Sam's for $85 or so and then a sheet cake to go with it. Get plates and such in bulk there as well, along with nuts and dinner mints or something. IF you want cheese trays or veggie trays, arrange your own.Get the plates and forks there also. Plain white napkins are fine and they have nice ones. Party stores sell rolls of plastic table covers and Dollar Tree sells them also. Skip the "real food" and make lemonade, tea and coffee. . Make the best of what you can do with your budget. While self catering is very unpopular, if you stick to veggie trays I would think its ok. I had an emergency wedding at a hospital for my dying father, I get the sick family and wanting them to see it. The picture is of my Sam's cake from that hospital wedding.

If I ONLY had a $600 budget. I'd go buy a pretty dress, head to the courthouse with mine and FH parents & then go have a nice dinnet with them afterwards.

$600 is an unrealistic budget for anything other than an elopment.

Celia yes it is. My final comment to her was about the fact that her wedding shouldn't be about a big family reunion. I told her to properly host a smaller wedding.

One guest or none the purpose of the day is her wedding. Period. Guests are invited to a wedding for two people. It doesn't suddenly turn into a "get together" when you invite someone. It's still a freaking wedding.

Sarah, I'm not sure which comment you're replying to, but I am always on team small wedding. Not necessarily with a courthouse, which is kinda unromantic in most courthouses (not all), but with far less guests.

There is always a real lack of reality in these threads, as if simply wanting to have dozens of hundreds of guests will make it possible on any budget.

It doesn't.

@celia then you clearly didn't read my post but quickly jumped down my throat. I suggested she pare down (like everyone else), I suggested she do a simple reception ( like everyone else). The fact that I simply said, she should remain focused on the purpose of the event doesn't mean that she forget her guests in the process. Honestly, sometimes blunt comments are not well read and you have some of the most blunt I've seen. At one point you said "time:never" which, frankly, how dare you. This is not your wedding and she asked for realistic advice.

I agree with most other posters here OP you deserve a wedding and congrats for having one you can afford. My suggestion is simply remember that the purpose here is to celebrate you and FH then host a party for those who can attend.

Go to the courthouse lmao why is this so funny to me. Jeezus

2pm sounds fine for a low-key, cake and punch reception.

I would skip the sandwiches and other food. Get sheet cakes from Sam's Club and if you want a cake to cut get a small 6 in. 1/2 sheet cakes are 30-40 and serve 48 people. Punch can be simple as Hawaiian Punch and Sprite or Raspberry sherbert and Sprite. Get the cheaper lemon lime knock off brand pop its ok. If you want nuts and mints get them from Sam's Club too. Its doable if you do your research. Good luck.

Wait, so cake and punch receptions are actually not an acceptable alternative if your budget doesn't allow for a large party? I'm confused. She said she has already secured the cake and beverage, but people are still telling her she can't afford it and that she needs to cancel and elope... what?

@Chivy As usual, some people are latching onto bits of information without looking at the whole picture. This could've been a short, simple thread.