Cash only registry or mix?

I’m not a fan of cash registries. People know cash is a good gift. They don’t need to be told. As far as the bridal shower goes, showers are usually for physical gifts so I personally would never bring cash to a shower. If we were close enough that I could guess what you’d like, I’d get you something. If we weren’t close enough for me to do that, I’d probably just decline the shower invite.

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Thanks Sarah for your insight. But per your reasoning (I'm not trying to be combative at all just raising a counter point, i really do appreciate your comment!), isn't the point of a registry for you to tell people what would be a good gift for you as a couple? And what if that best gift for them at their point in their lives is money?

I’m looking at it in a few ways. My Fh and I have been together thirteen years and have a fully established home so we don’t need material items. I’ve been having the debate with myself too on how to handle a registry. One, have none and let people gift or give cards if they feel like it and if not, no big deal I’ll be happy they came. Two, if I decide to do something I wouldn’t do just a cash fund but I think a honeymoon fund is appropriate and pretty much the same thing, just worded differently and people feel like they are buying you something or at least feel like they know where you’re spending their money. As far as my bridal shower goes, I’ll probably do a themed shower, like nighties and lingerie. Everyone will know what type of gift to give, it will be fun to see all the different styles, and Fh will be happy about it too!

FH and I have lived together 5 years now and don’t really need or want stuff either. We plan to have a small registry with upgrades to things we have and things we’d like to replace just for the shower my MOHs are already talking about throwing. For example: I love new towels and they’ll always get used, same with sheets, we’d like to upgrade our vacuum, I recently got a Kitchen Aid mixer and would like a few attachments, picture frames for wedding photos, etc. I’d rather give people ideas of things we’ll actually use than have people gift what they think we’ll like. I think it also depends on your crowd, we have a lot of family that prefer physical gifts and won’t give gift cards or cash at a shower.

View Quoted Comment I like this idea a lot! My FH and I have also been together a long time (10 yrs) and have established a home so this maybe a great route for us too

View Quoted Comment Yeah our crowd is very mixed I think some people may be ok with cash while others are not

Our primary registry is our honeymoon fund through Zola, but we do also have a small registry of some upgrade items for people who'd prefer to get us something tangible. If you can think of anything you'd like a nicer version of, I might add a small gift registry as well! Some of our items are a blender-food processor combo, a Dyson vacuum, nicer wineglasses, upgraded pots and pans, etc. if that sparks any ideas for you. Otherwise it isn't the end of the world if you just do a honeymoon registry - it's becoming very, very common nowadays. I literally just received an invite this week where the details card said the couple has everything they could ever need and doesn't have a gift registry, but if guests want to bring something to the wedding then they would love contributions towards their honeymoon.

I probably wouldn't do a traditional bridal shower in your case though, since they're usually geared towards showering the bride with gifts. If you want an event like that, it can either be a lingerie shower or a bridal "brunch" (something that doesn't have "shower" in the name) with games but no gifts.

1.) You don’t need to register for cash. Everyone knows cash is a good gift, they don’t need you to tell them.
2.) If you don’t want physical gifts, don’t have a shower. That’s the whole point of a shower.

View Quoted Comment Then I would suggest they not have a registry at all and either not have a shower or have a themed shower (recipe, stock the bar, etc).

People may not get you things on the registry anyway based on my experience. I had both because I kept getting asked for tangible items I'd want for the shower aha so the registry just made it easier to communicate that.

Most cash registries take out a percentage of what your guests give, which is why they're not the best option. Not registering or having a small one means people will usually just give you cash. It's totally fine to not have a shower, by the way! If someone offers to host, you're free to decline

Since cash-only registries are a huge scam I’m not a fan

Also they sell your information to third party vendors so that’s always a fun extra your guests get to worry about.

My husband and I had already established our home before we got married. We chose to do a small registry of upgrades or fun things we’ve always wanted. When the registry ran dry we didn’t add anything new. People aren’t dumb. No one needs to be told cash is a good gift.

I am doing a cash registry for money for the future ..... i see nothing wrong with one .... i just dont need anything and i am also not having a bridal shower .... just a bachelorette party for me and a few friends to hang out and have fun which is exactly what a bridal shower is but with gifts

1. I'm not a fan of cash registries. Typically we gift cash regardless, but I don't need a cash registry telling me how much to gift and what for. It's a lot easier for us just to put cash in a card. I also think you should at least have a small physical gift registry, a lot of people prefer to gift physical items instead of money.

2. I would skip a shower if you have just a cash registry.

I did a mix...however, I don't see anything wrong with a strictly cash registry. On our gift registry we put a lot of gift cards hoping most people will take the hint that we prefer (and won't be offended by) money versus a gift.

My friend did this, and I will be following.

They set up a Cash/Honeymoon fund at the Reception. They had three destinations picked out, and you could drop off your envelope into whichever one you wanted them to go to. The one that had the most funds was their destination. It was a lot of fun for them and the guests.

You may find comments on this topic helpful: https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/is-it-okay-to-ditch-the-registry/cb6a976ce2dfaed1.html

We are likely not having a registry at all (but we aren't having an engagement party or shower either, just the wedding and reception) and just hoping our guests enjoy their time with us or, if they feel the need to give us something, give us cash gifts. I personally hate stuff just for the sake of stuff, so feel like there is no need to give someone a physical object if cash is what they want and prefer!

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Oh that's a cool idea - I will pose that to the FH!