Cash Registry for Adoption (same sex couple)

Hey Brian, welcome to WeddingWire! If you don't register, people will take the hint that you want cash/checks instead of physical gifts. I would just go that route instead of writing something on the registry page directly asking for monetary contributions.

I just wouldn't register. Asking for money is technically tacky but if you do not have a registry, people will get the idea and gift you money anyhow!

Skip the registry and you can use the cash gifts toward whatever you want.

I would just skip a registry and skip the mention of it on your website. People will get the hint, and gift cash! Then you won't feel guilty if you want to use it towards something other than adoption since you didn't outwardly state it's for adoption. I'd also tell immediate family & wedding party your hopes for cash gifts for an adoption fund so they can answer if guests ask them.

I had a honeymoon fund and in all honesty not many people were inclined to donate to it. Most people just preferred sending me or giving me cash directly.

Don't do a cash registry. They charge fees and look super tacky. If you MUST have an explanation for what kind of gift you want, I'd put it on your wedding website.


Good luck!

I agree with skipping a registry or site (because, as you said, they take a cut). However, if you love what your FH wrote on the registry page maybe cut and paste it to the FAQ section under a question like "where are you registered?" Or something like that.


Happy planning and congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

I'm actually going through this same dilemma right now about the cash registry. I'm also in a same sex couple, together for almost 10 years. We're in our mid 40s and really don't need much by way of new things that people usually gift for weddings, so we would prefer cash if people are inclined to give us a gift.

I've always thought it was understood that if you say you're not registered that it's common knowledge that means you want cash. I've been looking at a lot of other posts about this, and saw some couples saying that they ended up with a lot of gift cards because they weren't specific about wanting cash. I mean, that really makes sense since so many people buy gift cards these days so that it at least seems like there's some thought to it. These comments got me paranoid, and since we don't want gift cards to buy stuff we don't need, I'm mentioning on our website that we would most appreciate any support to visit my fiancé's family in Brazil after the wedding. I totally get that some people will see this as tacky, and I REALLY appreciate that people are going to want to give us gifts, but I don't want to end up with gift cards that we wouldn't get the best use out of.

We all need to start being realistic... times are changing, and if people don't understand how enormously expensive weddings are, then they're living under a rock! I don't go to a lot of weddings, but when I do, I always give cash knowing that the couple is dropping a lot of money to host me at their wedding.

Congratulations and best of luck!

I just have to say I LOVE THIS. If there is a non-tacky way/reason to ask for money, its to bring a child into your life that needs a loving family.

It's not super uncommon for people to request funds towards a honeymoon as wedding gifts, and if that's socially acceptable I feel like a couple request gifts towards adoption in lieu of physical wedding presents should be okay too. I think putting a note about it on your wedding website and then using cash gifts however you want is probably the simplest way to go about it.

Good luck!