Catholic Ceremony on Saturday/Reception on Sunday??? HELP!

Thanks

I agree that it is really rude to get married before the ceremony your guests will be attending and then lie to them about it. I think having your "legal" ceremony the day of your reception and then a small Catholic ceremony AFTER is fine though. That's kind of what my parents did...although no one knew about their first one actually but they didn't have a big party for either. They just had a private legal ceremony at the courthouse and then a Catholic one in the church later, when they worked up the nerve to tell my disapproving Grandma, so that their marriage would be recognized by the church.

Do whatever you want, but don't expect guests, beyond your immediate family, to block two days of a holiday weekend. And don't buy into the 'lying' thing. Plenty of people get married privately before their big day, for many different reasons.

That being said, if a Catholic ceremony is important to you, that detail should have been the first one put in place.

I personally would prefer not to attend a wedding on a long weekend at all - if it can be avoided. Especially on Labor Day weekend in Connecticut - where all the hotels will have crazy rates and 2 night minimums.....etc, etc. Try to move it to another date. Your guests will appreciate it.

Does the wedding have to be that weekend? I am having my ceremony in the Catholic Church as well (Saturday though), but I booked the church before I booked the reception venue since it was more important to me that it was a Catholic ceremony. But yes, back to my original question, does it really have to be on that particular weekend or can you just choose another date where you can have both the church and the reception venue on the same day?

Also, just in case this helps, I wouldn't care whether I saw your first wedding ceremony, or your second, or your third...to me, they all celebrate your union. As to which day you would celebrate your anniversary...you choose which one you want. Someone I know had to get married legally first for many reasons and then had their ceremony later and they celebrate both anniversaries.

I think I found a church that will do the ceremony on Sunday!!! The only problem is the pastor is leaving for Rome that evening. He was very nice and said he would be willing to do it no problem, but it would likely be an early afternoon time like 2pm. Our venue has a time slot of 6-11pm so that means our guests will have a few hours in between. Is that okay?

We got married prior to our wedding, which I know isn't everyone's cup of tea. But it was important to us that our officiant be the mutual friend who introduced us, and Virginia's process for getting ordained is complex and highly costly. So two days before, we went to a JOP in the basement of a Jerry's Subs and Pizza, with my mom and sister, to get things legal before we left the country for our honeymoon.

We didn't lie to our guests about it - if anyone asked, we explained that the ceremony they attended was our wedding for all intents and purposes (and it's the anniversary we celebrate), but we had to knock out the legal part. However, I imagine it's a different beast if it's a religious ceremony.

That said, I think whenever possible the wedding and reception should be on the same day to minimize travel and expense for your guests.

I'm sorry - the first time i wrote this i was really rude and that's not entirely fair. i think your intentions are good.

everyone I know who has gone to a wedding on the Sunday of Labor Day weekend (i've known of two people who had weddings on that day) has been annoyed by the whole idea of it. So i think you trying to make it easier on them is actually costing people something like one last weekend at the Beach, or with their kids before school starts

i'm glad you seem to have found someone to marry you on that Sunday, but a three-hour gap sounds awful in my opinion. what am i supposed to do during that time? go somewhere to eat before your wedding, where i'll be eating? can you move your reception up to 3pm? or is there another person at that church who can marry you there at a later time?

again i think your intentions are good - i just think you started a little backwards IF a Catholic ceremony was that important to you.

Can you be honest to your guests about being already married?

I'm having two weddings (in different countries) and while the first one is small, it'll be when we actually marry. The second one will be large and we will have already been legally married.

We're not keeping it a secret though. So while I'll have a ceremony in my second wedding, it'll be more a religious affair for me personally, while the legal marriage will happen in the country I'm currently living in.

"I think I found a church that will do the ceremony on Sunday!!! The only problem is the pastor is leaving for Rome that evening. He was very nice and said he would be willing to do it no problem, but it would likely be an early afternoon time like 2pm. Our venue has a time slot of 6-11pm so that means our guests will have a few hours in between. Is that okay?"

This solves your issues. Your guests will be fine.

BTW, we had a 2pm ceremony. Our reception was from 3-10.

Your churches are lying to you. My mom got married to my biological dad on a Sunday in a Catholic Church. Granted, it was nearly 30 years ago, but still. I hate all the "rules". This is why I am not Catholic anymore.

But I agree with most of the sentiment. Have all of your wedding activities (except rehearsal and all that) on one day.

Melissa - Do you mind sharing the name of the church/priest? I am in a similar situation and need to find a Catholic church near Mystic,CT to get married on a Sunday (holiday weekend). I'd really appreciate it!!