Catholic Ceremony

Talk to the priest or church secretary to find out the procedures and any requirements you have to meet first.

We had a Catholic ceremony (non-Mass version) for our micro wedding in October. One thing the Catholics are good at is the wedding rehearsal. You'll get the full instructions the night before. The music is pretty limiting, everything has to be pre-approved and pretty religious-y. They also give you a book so you select all the prayers and readings beforehand. The wedding party doesn't stand the whole time, they sit in the first pew. Maid of honor and best man stand at alter during vows. We originally did the Catholic ceremony for our parents, but honestly ended up glad we did it. Everything was very beautiful and kindof sacred feeling. We got a lot of compliments from the guests. The pics were great! We're planning a second big wedding outdoors next year (hopefully) and plan to do different modern readings and fun music, so we get the best of both. Good luck!

View Quoted Comment We’re having our catholic micro-wedding next week so happy yours turned out so beautiful! Same thing here, pamphlet to pick readings and music selection provided to choose from.

Ask about pre cana, either counseling sessions in a group, or online, to prepate you for Catholic Marriage. They are required. And they usually give you brief how to stuff, choices of music, comportment and appearance. The last two: behaving in a dignified manner, respectful of the fact that marriage is a sacrament, also means no free rein with sand ceremonies or hand fasting, no add ons at the ceremony, little decorating beyond flowers, ribbons to mark seating. And as a presumed Catholic virgin entering into marriage, all women's dresses must be modest. No bare neck and shoulders, no dress slits, nothing fitted tight, minimal cleavage. If you want strapless or thin spaghetti straps, buy at least a lacy button up topper, or a bolero or shrug with sleeves and coverage. They usually ask to see a picture before the wedding, which can be a designer's picture. They will refuse to marry you if it looks like sexy club wear.

We had a catholic wedding, nonmass. I had never been to a catholic wedding either.
Same as what others have said. Some will depend on your parish/diocese I thought personalized vows weren’t allowed, but we were asked if we wanted to do them. Same as a unity ceremony. So don’t be afraid to ask. You will get a booklet with all the options you can choose. Your music choices will probably be limited, but again don’t be afraid to ask. Check with your church sooner rather than later as far as limitations on things like your dress, decor, tossing petals etc. that way you don’t spend money on things that aren’t allowed. You and your wedding party will not be standing the whole time. You will sit during the readings, homily, and I’m assuming the consecration portion. Find out what’s required as far as pre-canna Check and see what time weddings are performed and then plan your day around that as far as reception times and such.

View Quoted Comment This isn’t completely accurate in all cases. Each parish or dioceses is different.
I was allowed a strapless dress and we were offered many different opportunities to personalize our ceremony.

Lol. Don’t believe everything you read on here. My dress was form fitting with spaghetti straps. Also I would never let anyone ever pre-approve my attire for any event. Ever. Lol.

Another Catholic bride...marriage prep was required as well as a natural family planning class in my diocese.


My dress is also spaghetti straps and I do not have to get is approved. So that’s diocese dependent as well.
In terms of music, ask to see if your parish has old wedding programs. They are a great source to look through to help with music selections.

I'm in a similar situation--FH wanted to have a Catholic wedding; I'm confirmed but not really practicing. I've been a bridesmaid in a Catholic wedding & we stood up front at the beginning & during the vows but that was it. Otherwise, we sat/knelt/stood in the front row. My cousin had a Catholic wedding & I think it was the same, but this might depend on the parish.

I think most things depend on the parish you're getting married in, so I would sort that out sooner rather than later. For example, we haven't yet met with our priest, as he doesn't want to meet until 6 months before the wedding, but it seems like other parishes will meet earlier. We're penciled in on our date but nothing is "official" until we meet with the priest & he approves it. I do know we have to do pre-Cana early next year, & we need to get the "records" of our baptisms & confirmations within six months of the wedding. We were sent the music choices & readings already, but the coordinator said we didn't need to choose until much later on. I had heard most places don't allow unity candles or "here comes the bride" & so was surprised to see both as options in our pamphlet; my cousin also had "here comes the bride"...so I think it really depends!

In short, I think you still won't know what to prepare for until you speak with the parish. But preparing couples for marriage is an important part of the priest's & coordinator's job, & they will definitely help you through it & answer your questions

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Question - what is a non mass version of a catholic ceremony? My fiance (a non catholic) and me (grew up catholic) met with the priest yesterday to reserve our date and start our paperwork and from what they explained to us we only had a choice of a full on 1 hour wedding mass?

View Quoted Comment It is the ceremony without Communion. We were given the option to do either.