Church Ceremony Before Commitment Ceremony and Reception?

Are you saying that you want a religious ceremony before or after your legal ceremony?

A very private wedding in a Catholic church or chapel days or weeks before a ( in venue) non-religious one that is paired repeating vows, and reception, is very nice.

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Either way! I'm curious what others have done. I believe whichever comes first (church or venue ceremony) we would make the legal ceremony. After brief research, I think the marriage will have to be legally binding while at the religious ceremony or already done beforehand.

Typically the church would want your church ceremony to happen first. We did not do this but thought about and our priest was very willing to work with us. I do know someone who did do this though. They got married at church 2 days before their big outdoor wedding.
The best thing for you to do is talk with your priest. They can answer all your questions, let you know if requirements or restrictions, and let you know what all your options are.
Good luck, and congratulations!

You can definitely do a Catholic ceremony before a secular, non-legal ceremony (probably would technically be a vow renewal or commitment ceremony at that point). Having a religious ceremony after being legally married will likely cause some issues, just due to how the Catholic Church views marriage (i.e. a Catholic being married in any other way doesn't "count"). That being said, I know you can get convalidated in the church after a legal ceremony, but it has to be approved. I think the usual reasons for legal-marriage-before-convalidation is because you desperately need health insurance, the military is making you move, etc. Your best bet to iron out the before/after options is to talk to your priest, as he would be the one who would need to okay any out of the ordinary plans.

I can't speak to your own family situation, but I don't think that anyone should be rude toward anyone else invited. Adults should be able to accept people as they are, & if for some reason are not mature enough to do so, know not say anything. I also have mentally ill family members, as well as some with various disabilities, who will all be invited to my wedding (COVID pending, haha). If you're really worried, I would ask your aunts (or their caretakers) if they are concerned about negative reactions from others. Or if you think someone will be rude, I would argue *those* guests should be off the invite list!

I have a few questions though. Not for you to answer here, unless you want to, but to think about:

- Someone getting married in the Catholic church often wants to share that religious experience with their religious family & friends, while also introducing non-Catholics to the church. Will you regret not sharing that with your family & friends?

- In a similar vein, will your family & friends (especially the Catholic ones) be upset that they weren't invited to your actual wedding ceremony? Regardless of the order, a Catholic isn't truly considered married until it's done in the church.

- How does your FH feel about this? Are you both Catholic, or just one? Is one of you more religious than the other?

I'm getting married in the Catholic church, although I'm certainly not an expert. The travel piece is *definitely* annoying.