Church wedding debate

We were married at an outdoor venue (rather than a church) by an Episcopal Priest, whom we contracted outside of the church (that is to say, we are not Episcopalian). He did a moderately religious ceremony, but nothing over the top.

You are not a commodity which can be acquired subject to conditions – your father may have asked that you get married in a church but you are under no obligation to do so unless that is what you and your fiancé actually want to do. I am not religious myself but, in my experience,, religious weddings tend to be less sentimental than civil ceremonies because there is a certain amount of scripture which is generally covered in the ceremony.

Considering that you and your fiancé do not attend church nor practice, I personally would suggest a civil ceremony, however if you elect to go the church route, I would encourage you perhaps to look into a non-denominational church or one which allows you to bring your own celebrant (or minister) so that you can at least personalise the ceremony some more. Be mindful that for a church wedding you generally need to attend a pre-martial course (and a few services) and your dates and times for the ceremony will be reduced (i.e. some churches will not conduct weddings on Saturdays and/or Sundays).

I would do whatever you and your fiancé want. I think has non-church goers, it would be odd to get married in a church. My parents always dreamed I would get married in a church, however, my wife and I are not religious people and chose a vineyard instead. This wedding is about you and your fiancé only and should reflect you two as a couple.

I am not sure about where you are located, but around me, there are chapels that are strictly wedding venues. They look like little churches, and have some of the same aspects you would expect to see at a church, but it is not an active church. This might be a good compromise!

Do whatever feels right to you both as a couple!

I was also raised in the Catholic church, had communion, and also confirmed like you, but I don't practice it at all lol. FH isn't religious either, so we both decided that having our wedding in a church wasn't the best fit for us, and didn't feel true to who we are. We don't attend church regularly, and if we go it's because FH's family invites us to like holiday services. We just don't feel comfortable in a church setting. My mother and family aren't happy, but I honestly don't care haha. If we don't feel comfortable having a church wedding, then why would we have one? Doesn't make sense does it?

I'd talk to your FH and see what he thinks. If you both agree to not have a church wedding, then don't have one! The only people you really need to please and make happy is yourselves.

If you are not religious and neither is your fiance, then I don't think requests from family or friends for your wedding should even be considered. You are the one getting married, and if you want to get married in a church, then you should! If you don't, then I would not get married in a church. Their religious beliefs are theirs, and if you are not involved then I would not feel pressured to get married in a church. You only get one wedding, make it the one you want. It's easy to succumb to the pressure of family and friends, but I would stick to your guns and make it clear this is about you and your fiance, not other people's wants, needs, or religious beliefs.

If you would truly like and prefer to be married in a church but do not want the "ideas" of the extensions of what belief that church is see if you can find a non-denominational church in your area, or the area you think that you want to get married in. So that way it could satisfy the church factor without the worries of it being a certain denomination.
Do whatever you both think and feel is best, remember this day is your special day and is solely about you two!

"You are not a commodity which can be acquired subject to conditions."

Just wanted to emphasize this because it is 100% on point.