Civil Ceremony but then have Wedding later

You can have the civil wedding first. Be 100% transparent and honest with your guests though. Don't say you're engaged for any reason if you are already legally married. Call the second ceremony a vow renewal which it is because the legal ceremony is the wedding. People will be more offended if you say you're engaged when you're actually not. Most people understand that's how military weddings go to have a private ceremony first but don't be deceptive at any time.

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I just have an issue stating the ceremony as a vow renewal since we don't consider the legal ceremony as the real one. Not saying we are going to decide our guests but if they get butthurt about it oh well. I just hope that people won't get mad at us for wanting to have the whole big wedding and see that as the true wedding even if the pice of paper doesn't state the same date. The legal marriage also isn't the date we are going to be celebrating for our anniversary. If we could wait to have it on the date we wanted we would but because of the military, we have been doing a lot of things unorthodox.

My husband is military and we got legally married in September for a few reason. It was a very small ceremony so that we could be legally married. We are having our big-ish (30 or so people) wedding on November 7th. Everyone knows we are legally married but everyone is referring to the ceremony in November as our wedding, not vow renewal. We were 100% upfront about getting legally married and why we did it. Many guest can’t attend the bigger ceremony due to Covid and the military travel restrictions. I’d definitely be upfront about being legally married, I don’t think anyone would be offended unless you weren’t upfront about it. The big ceremony is technically still your wedding. From what I’ve read, a lot of couples are having minimonies or elopements and then doing the big ceremony later because of the pandemic. I’d just be upfront with your guest about it.

Hi Kesley! I agree with Marabeth! I don't think you should have to actively hide your legally married status, but you also don't have to advertise it either!

I've had friends get legally married a week to a month before their big wedding for several reasons - including having a private family religious service ahead of time, and 3 couples who were dealing with K1 visas and did quick courthouse weddings to take care of the legal part ahead of time. I'm sure everyone will understand your military timeline constraints!!