Color restrictions

Why does it bother you if a guest wears a wedding color? Personally, I think it is inappropriate to dictate what guests wear.

The only people whose dress/color code you get to dictate are those in the wedding party.

I've seen invites include "black tie only", so I didn't know if it'd be any different?

I wouldn’t say anything about what guests should wear unless you’re having a black tie wedding. These guests won’t be in your wedding pics so it shouldn’t matter.

View Quoted Comment Requesting “Black tie” attire is just requesting a level of formality, not requesting a certain color. Why does it matter if guests wear the wedding colors? It’s not like they’ll be in the same dresses as the bridesmaids or anything

View Quoted Comment That's what I thought; black tie meant level of formality, not color. Or are there new guidelines to black tie such as wearing colors? I'm a little confused.

We went to a black tie wedding and it was SUPER formal, all guests were wearing black.. the family requested it when attire came up in conversation. It was our first black tie event so we didn't know any better

Why do you care if a guest matches the wedding colors?

There’s no good way to put that on an invitation lol. You can put it if it’s that important to you but as a guest I would find it odd and wonder what kind of wedding I’m about to attend. 😬

View Quoted Comment Haha true, thanks Rachel! I really was just curious, like I said before, didn't know if it was any different than black tie considering the black tie event we experienced

I don’t think it will really matter what colors guests wear because they won’t be in your pictures! Anyone that will be in photos you can give the message to personally. I wouldn’t put anything about guests’ clothes on the invites (unless it’s dressing for a level of formality).

I like it when guests match I think it’s pretty!

Yes... it would be very weird. Burgundy is a popular color, a lot of dresses have nice gold accents. This will not affect your wedding day at all if someone wears the same color as your wedding color. Please don't.

View Quoted Comment Black tie means a certain level of formality. Men in a midnight blue tux or charcoal grey tux are fine, and women wear any color, not just black. So it does not limit colors, or any style choice within that level of formality.

View Quoted Comment I agree.... Oftentimes we matched the colors or at least color coordinated on purpose. It looks very nice almost as if your guests are part of the decor.

It is not psychotic, as there are no signs of disordered thought patterns, etc. But it has always been considered rude to dictate color and style of clothing for guests at a social event, unless the clothing items affect safety, do damage, or are illegally brief. ( So okay to say no high heels when snowy or icy conditions, or on a boat, or no flowing gauzy capes and sleeves where candles are used, or open fire, all safety things. Okay to say no rivets on jeans, or no high heels, where valuable chair upholstery or wood floors would be damaged.) . But to dictate colors, is rude. And to basically say, we don't want you to dress in these colors because we want them for ourselves, doubly rude. You cannot have it but we can, has never been accepted manners. This is why wmthe etiquette rule is mot, no white at weddings. The rule is, no white dresses that look like bridal materials and style. Only one ( or 2) brides at a wedding. Color and any other style that does not connote bridal role is fine, even non bridal looking white suits and dresses. For a masquerade, you can indicate the level of formality is " costume", you also have to accept, usual daily costume, that is, regular day or evening clothes. Not colors, not style. Some couples have taken to asking all guests to wear black and white, or no pastels. No matter how many do it, it is rude to dictate the dress of adults in social settings. Last spring, on a cold and rainy Friday night , at a wedding where the couple asked, black dresses and suits requested, on their invitation, because they wanted it for photos, I saw more bright red and orange dresses, light blue suits, and tan ones, than at a summer afternoon wedding. Not me, I was in emerald green. ( I wanted to wear rainbow tights, but we went out to dinner on our way there. My husband is easily embarrassed.) . Ordinarily, at least a quarter of the women would have been in black cocktail dresses. None. When most of 200 guests go out of their way to do the opposite of a rude request made by a couple, they are expressing their opinion of the couple's manners. People do get offended. Or laugh at and ridicule hosts for their bad manners. Don't do it, unless you want that.

Dictating what your guests wear is really overstepping. You're going to have people wear your wedding colors, especially when you're having an October wedding and your colors are burgundy and gold, but what's the issue with that? I've never been to an April wedding where the couple told me I wasn't allowed to wear lavender or a July wedding where I wasn't allowed to wear peach, because those are appropriate colors for the season.

View Quoted Comment That's what I thought. The previous comments confused me. Thanks

View Quoted Comment When I lived near Boston, and FI in NYC, the majority or all of the guests during cold weather, for dinner or evening parties, symphony or ballet or museum dinners or cocktails before a fundraising event or first performance or exhibition for members of a supporting group, all loved black. Men in black dinner jacket / tux or plain black suits, women in black cocktail or formal wear. Not designer clothes or celebrity type crowd. Attention getting accessories and jewelry only. I had a hard time convincing my then FI that midnight blue, and dark gray tuxedos had been around since tuxes first came to be in the early 20th century. I gave him a midnight blue tux for his birthday, a month before we were going to a very formal wedding of a very well off boss of his. Black tie, and I wanted to wear a cranberry velvet dress with him in darkest blue ( Italian olive complexion and black hair on him. ) He actually looked it up in a book. Surprise! People answering above like it is a color designation are likely going by what they know from going to such things where they live. Not "by the rule book." Some cities, chic sophistication and high class = black and white.

I would not put that and just try not to worry about it. My wedding is in less than a month and so many people have asked me what the bridesmaids are wearing bc they don’t want to wear the same color.