I am sure many of you have seen my repeated grievances that we had about our venue and the horrible events people that worked there, throughout the wedding planning process. They made planning an absolute nightmare, put me into tears multiple times, and a lot of the time I was honestly excited for the wedding to be over just so I could be done with them. On the day-of, they basically messed up everything they possibly could have messed up. We had an AMAZING and beautiful day, and it was completely in spite of them. Here are just some of the things they did, building up to the wedding and on the day itself, and I have an actual full list that is about 2 pages long (feel free to skim through this part, because it's a lot, and my main point is just to show that... it's A LOT -.-):
-Originally we were told they had speakers in the ballroom. Months later we were told they did not. Then more months later we were told they did. Then they tried to charge us $50 to use them.
-I once emailed event coordinator assistant asking "does the price listed on page 3 include the cost of hors douvres or is that just the entrees?" she responded by updating the entire contract, adding an open bar and pastries, and raising the cost by $4,000.
-Every time we would have something changed in the contract, they would mess something else up. Literally every time. One time the Director of Events changed the fine print to show that the final payment date had changed, and she just put that in the contract in fine print without even telling us.
-We had all 20 rooms blocked for our guests. We had booked the bridal suite for ourselves, for 3 nights. It wasn't just blocked, it was already booked and in the system. Director of events called me 2 separate times to ask me if we would give up the bridal suite for the couple getting married the night before us (not just another room, she asked for OUR ROOM that we had already booked), and tried to guilt me by saying "they will have nowhere else to stay." I eventually caved and said she could give that couple a different suite in the hotel.-Overall complete rudeness and hostility from the Director of Events.THEN, after all this, 2 weeks before the wedding we escalated things to the General Manager. We had a 2 hour meeting with her where she reassured us that they would be making the next 2 weeks as stress-free as possible, and she specifically said we would never have to deal with the Director of Events again because of how rude she had been to me, and that she would not be at our rehearsal or our wedding. General Manager said that she personally would be at our rehearsal and our wedding, and that I would also have a bridal attendant to help me with everything I could need on the day of the wedding.-General Manager was not at our rehearsal. She informed me of that the morning of the rehearsal, because she had to take her daughter's dog to the vet at noon. The rehearsal was at 3:15.-When we arrived at the rehearsal, there was no one there to help us out. We finally got the banquet manager to assist us, but he got the processional order wrong even though it was right in front of him on a piece of paper, directed people to the wrong sides of the room, and was basically just rushing us through the entire thing. I ended up having to run the rehearsal myself (even though I have no idea how to run a rehearsal) and was rushed by him by the ENTIRE TIME, even though we were told we could use the ballroom until 4pm and we were out by 3:45.-THE DIRECTOR OF EVENTS WAS AT MY WEDDING. And not only was she THERE, but she was standing behind the curtain and was the one to send me off down the aisle. Seeing her literally started to put me into a panic attack and I rushed out of the room. This was DURING our processional. My mom ran over to the General Manager and reminded her that she had promised us that the Director of Events would not be present at our wedding. General Manager rolled her eyes and said she'd "talk to her." General Manager went over to Director of Events, said something, and then they both started laughing. I was then forced to have the Director of Events--who had been AWFUL to me for the past year, be the last person I saw or spoke to before walking down the aisle at my wedding ceremony.-We were told that the banquet manager would be there to MC the day of our wedding. I had gone over with the General Manager REPEATEDLY that we would be doing our grand entrance into the reception, then sitting down and having toasts done, then eating, then doing our first dance, and then opening up the dance floor to everyone else. After doing our grand entrance, banquet then announces that we will be doing our first dance. I turned to him and started shaking my head because this was NOT the order we wanted. He just continued to announce it. Husband and I were then forced to do our first dance before we were ready, and since we were so caught off-guard and not ready, it completely ruined what should have been a beautiful and special moment for us.-Later on, banquet manager asked us if we wanted to open up the dance floor. We said yes. He said to put on a song and then he would make an announcement in the microphone saying that the dance floor was open. He even went so far as to turn the volume louder on the speakers. I clicked on a song, and by the time I turned around, banquet had disappeared WITH THE MICROPHONE. This made the beginning of our dancing SO awkward, since he hadn't announced anything and he took the microphone with him so we couldn't do it! He reappeared a few minutes later acting like he didn't know that we had wanted him to make an announcement (even though he had been the one to say he was going to do it, and we said "yes let's do it now").
-There was no bridal attendant on the day of the wedding! Having a bridal attendant is something that is IN THE WEDDING PACKAGE, and this service is INCLUDED in the price of having a wedding at the Bernards Inn... meaning, we paid for this service that we were not given, and the General Manager just brushed it off like it was no big deal that there was no bridal attendant. My mom had to rush around the entire day acting as a bridal attendant instead of enjoying the wedding herself.
This is only about half the things they have done. As you can tell, I am still pretty upset about all of it, even though we had a wonderful day in spite of them. I have been debating for the past few weeks what to do, and I think I have 4 options (or any combination of them):
A. Go straight to the top and complain to the Owner of the inn (who I have never met or dealt with before) and try to get some money back (money back would especially be for the "bridal attendant" that was included in the package, but we were not provided with...)
B. Complain to the General Manager (who I have dealt with, but was one of the people who ended up being awful) and try to get some money back
C. Write an honest review online
D. Let it go
I feel like I am too righteous to let it go, that I can't just let them get away with having been this horrible and having made my life so miserable during what should have been such a happy time. But at the same time, I have such severe anxiety already and as you can tell, just thinking about this gets me so upset all over again. I am not sure if I should bother trying to get some justice or if I should just let it go and finally be DONE with them, for my own mental health sake, and not give them an opportunity to stress me out more.
What do you all think I should do??
