Conflict of invites to destination wedding.

Well what you're proposing to do is called "B-listing" and it's really rude on your part. You don't owe anyone an invitation. Also what if your declines change their mind? Then you're over capacity, because you can't uninvite people.

Sounds here like your feelings aren't being acknowledged or respected by your FI. I would suggest working on that aspect of your communication.

Destination weddings by their mere nature mean that you'll be needing to spend more time with guests than at a usual wedding. If you don't like someone, you have no obligation to include them, even if they ask, beg and plead (which is also rude, btw).

Thank you

Oof I'm so sorry!! I think with destination weddings, you honestly already have an out when someone asks why they didn't get an invite- we had a capacity limit and really needed to prioritize family (that's what we did- we're a semi-destination wedding, and really do have a small cap on how many people can be invited, and both my fiance and I have big families!). I would try to have your fiancé go back to them, and say I didn't realize we actually have a really tight limit and can't open up space, I'm so sorry. That's nothing against them then, and it's not saying he values their friendship any less, it's just saying look we had to prioritize family!

Thank you! Actually update: His cousin just messaged me to include them in the rsvp! Super rude they did not even get a formal invite. They want to celebrate this women I don't want there's 40 bday (her bday isn't until March!) I told her that we did have a cap on invites and I guess if they want to come to the resort with them that's fine but we haven't received a lot of rsvp's yet and need to go from there. Now for sure I don't want them there. So rude. I feel they will crash it anyway being they are staying at same resort.