Cooking for reception?

Niki; I actually saw chicken bologna in a can at my Dollar Tree yesterday. I almost had to buy it because it was so funny.

I bet Danielle is also making aunt Janet work as the photographer and not paying her, uncle jimmy is the Dj. Gotta save money for your botulism party legal fees.

Honestly, I'd be upset if I attended a wedding only to discover that it was...self-catered. I wish every self-catering bride would advise her guests that the food they are going to be served will not be prepared by certified food handlers in professional kitchens. Go ahead, put it right on your invitations -- something like, "Self-catered Reception and Cash Bar Immediately Following". You want to talk about a disproportionate number of declines? That's the ticket to make it happen.

If something is such a great idea, why hide it from the guests? Let them know that they're going to get good old fashioned cooking...or don't, and hope they don't notice. I've been to potlucks (church things, years ago -- not weddings), and if I had collected all of the hairs I pulled out of the various home kitchen offerings, I could have made a cute little toupee.

There is a myth being fostered that every couple deserves to have a big wedding. It's an entitlement issue for some people. If you can afford it, great. If you can't, wait until you can, get another job, have a small wedding, or elope. You cannot magically pull professional results out of the air -- and it doesn't matter how many bloggers continue to try and convince brides that all it takes to get around the cost factor is a little unconventional ingenuity. Professional results cost money. That's the beginning, middle, and end of the story, although for some reason that has to do with fantasy thinking, brides still believe it is possible to get around that immutable truth: You get what you pay for.

As for the image of family members doing that kind of work at a wedding, it actually upsets me. It's unfair, and even if they said yes (or offered), they have no realistic idea of what they're in for.

OP, you've been given great ideas. Someone even mentioned a place that serves at $9 PP. Maybe it won't be spiral ham, but you have to face facts -- you can't afford to serve 100 to 140 people ham and pulled pork.

Cash bar? I'm not even going there, but the "I don't want it in my photos" is something I've never heard before. I hope you're okay with flasks in your photos, because that's what's going to happen.

Celia: you might want to make a post! seems there are quite a few brides looking for a deal on catering, as of late...they may be interested.

@centerpiece, if I could like your comment a million times, I would!!! Omg the toupee line killed me lol!!!!

Don't forget the MOH can marry you. In most states.

The toupee line literally made me gag.

If I got to a self catered one?

I'd go home after the ceremony.

Sorry, Celia. Desperate times call for desperate measures, lol.

Bellamae: i plan to talk to a few soon after i discuss it with my MOH. the cash bar would only be for premium drinks as we'll have kegs and punches.

Celia Milton: i don't know why the word potluck keep being brought into my thread. I seen the other thread and I am against potlucks for wedding. I think its extremely tacky and plus I'm too picky of an eater to consider that. We have potlucks every family reunion on my grandmas side and I don't like half the cooked stuff they bring and am usually thankful for the few that brought kfc. I would be mortified to have that. A good friend of ours had potluck at her wedding but she also wore a blue prom dress and had a really tacky cake.

Laura: if i can find one, I'm in the process of looking. i don't really have a favorite locally owned restaurant as we mostly eat at the chain restaurants like applebees and logans and such but another lady suggested a few places near me that I plan on looking into.

Danielle: your budget is $150? BEST OF LUCK TO YOU!

Stacie: most places here allow that except for ones in downtown charleston which we're going for a barn venue so those weren't even in the running. i am looking into BBQ places once i discuss it with my MOH.

The Centerpiece Flowers: i wasn't going to have a potluck. that was another thread that I actually commented on and was against. i'm looking into the places suggested. its not really the photos that we're considering a cash bar its literally because I don't want people, potentially groomsmen, running to an ABC store or gas station in the middle or before the reception to get liquor or a certain beer. we're probably going to end up just doing the kegs and punches.

Well, Bella, after reading every post you authored, I was in no way convinced that you had tossed the self-catering idea. Mea culpa, if it applies.

On the plus side, I have to hand it to you -- you've read every post and responded to every poster -- for better or worse. As long as you've sincerely tossed the self-catering idea, I applaud you. Now....the cash bar....

I'm sorry if I misunderstood you, but please don't self cater. I'm glad you're looking around.

Yeah Danielle, "BEST OF LUCK TO YOU"

Allowing a parent to work your wedding, whether they volunteer to do it or not, is absolutely shameful.

Wow, kudos to you OP for being perceptive to posts!

It's been covered, but you can always contact caterers and some of them will customize a menu for your budget. As far as the bar goes, kegs and punches sound great, I would just nix anything else being available to be paid for to avoid confusion on what's free and what isn't.

Also, this thread has been going for what feels like forever.

My mother and sister caterer her wedding of 200. It was a HUGE success, but my mother and sister are professional chefs. If you aren't a professional chef, I would suggest hiring someone.

My cousin got married last summer and did BBQ and ham, slaw, Mac and cheese potato salad and beans. Everything was cooked by our family the day before the wedding and reheated in time for the reception. None of our family really got to enjoy the day because we were rushing around getting food ready. I'm all for being a completely DIY bride, don't get me wrong! But food is one thing I recommend having the pros do! Not sure of your area but try local restaurants! Or even local grocery stores. We're having a grocery store cater our wedding of 350 for a LOT less money than getting a local catering company to do it.

It is beyond me why anyone on a budget would invite multiple hundreds of people.

Sorry for just responding, had a superbowl party and have been tired.

The Centerpiece Flowers: as planned i discussed it with my best friend/MOH and she kinda agreed on the food poisoning thing. she's had food poisoning from a jalapeno burger at hardees before and from i remember, it was horrid.

Snarky: i don't even understand how its possible to do that. i think the marriage license will take a good chunk of that.

Bryce: i know! it has. i don't think we're going to do a cash bar as i feel like if everyone decides to drink what we provided, and they don't run out, it will be a waste of money.

Courtney: wow she helped do her own wedding. i guess as a professional, it wouldn't be too bad.

TheWeddingOfJ&M: a grocery store? what grocery store? what are yall having? how does that work?

Celia Milton: probably because they feel like they have to if its family. my cousin and his now wife, who had been together for like 6 years and engaged for 4 got married last summer on the beach and just had their kids and a few really good friends and my family is still mad about it. his mother, my aunt was invited but didn't go. i felt like he should have invited his sister and his grandmother(who helped raise him) at least but oh well it was their decision.

You don't have to. It's big jump from 20-200.....

I know this is an old article, but all this advice and judgement about being selfish is classist. Our grandmas didn’t have a 3k bill for every service of their wedding. There absolutely is a way to cook for your family at your own wedding. My family are Guatemalan immigrants. For my father in law’s 60th, we had a 100 guests and made pans of enchiladas and cooked them on site. We brought in pressure cookers of rice, l beans, and roasted sauces. We had the chicken boiled and shredded so all we had was to assemble and put in the oven a couple hours before people arrived and stored in low heat holding ovens. For the kids, we boiled hotdogs before people arrived and brought buns and condiments.