Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Kristina
Savvy April 2017

Courthouse wedding or wedding wedding?

Kristina, on January 20, 2017 at 10:01 PM Posted in Planning 0 18

I just recently got engaged and am stressing over planning a wedding. My fiancé and I don't have a lot of money right now and we really don't want to ask our family for help when they are struggling, too. I thought about having a small courthouse wedding with our closest friends and family and maybe a dinner afterwards. But then I think about missing out on a beautiful wedding with the rest of our family and friends. And our parents keep telling us we'll regret a courthouse wedding due to personal experiences. Truthfully, we just want to start our lives together and the sooner the better. I just need some opinions and words of wisdom. Courthouse wedding now or "proper" wedding towards the end of the year?

18 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on January 4, 2021 at 1:35 PM
  • RealLindseyO
    Master October 2017
    RealLindseyO ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    A courthouse wedding is a proper wedding and it's pretty offensive to say otherwise.

    If you think you'll regret not having a large wedding, wait until you can afford it and plan one.

    • Reply
  • Megan
    Devoted August 2018
    Megan ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Wait it out and start saving now

    • Reply
  • Mrs.Whooooo
    Master May 2017
    Mrs.Whooooo ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    There are a few users on here who had GORGEOUS courthouse weddings.

    Do yourself a favor and don't go into debt over one day. Google courthouse weddings and see what comes up

    • Reply
  • Kristina
    Savvy April 2017
    Kristina ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    @LindseyO I'm just quoting what a proper wedding is according to my parents. I'm considering a courthouse wedding. I think they're more intimate. Didn't mean to offend!

    • Reply
  • Linds
    Master March 2017
    Linds ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    There was a courthouse BAM this week or last week - and it was amazing.

    Amazing weddings happen when you carefully plan, and care about each other, and care about the guests you invite whether it's 2 guests or 200 guests.

    • Reply
  • Brittany
    VIP May 2017
    Brittany ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I would absolutely love to elope. I would do it tomorrow and lose all my deposits if FH agreed. Sadly, he will not.

    Depending where you are, I have to brag that california have amazing city halls and court houses that are under $500 to elope with you photographer as your witness. If you Google san francisco city hall or Santa Barbara courthouse, you will see beautiful weddings done that are intimate. Again, depending where you are, you could fly to CA, hire a photographer and get married for under $2000

    • Reply
  • AKCouple
    Super August 2017
    AKCouple ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    If my parents weren't helping out so much, we'd be married already and would've had a simple courthouse wedding. Would I be sad that I didn't get to have a big ordeal for our special day? Yes, definitely, but I'd be married and done with it by now, without stress or a large hit to our bank accounts, plus we'd be working on having a baby by now which is something we're really looking towards doing ASAP. But you have to weigh the cons on both sides. For me, the cons of a large wedding are that they take so long to plan and cause a lot of stress, and they are expensive AF. To me, I'm not sure which outweighs the other.

    You have to sit down and really weigh out what is more important to you. Maybe do a T-Chart and give 2 points for things that are really major to you that you'd miss out on, and 1 point to things that are important to you, but not major that you'd miss out on for both sides. Then tally up your points and make your decision.

    • Reply
  • Elizabeth
    Expert September 2018
    Elizabeth ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I always wanted to elope somewhere tropical, just me and FH. But we have two kids, so that isnt possible.

    Instead we are having a small wedding for just family. I'm happy wih this decision.

    But we did decide that for our 10 year anniversary we are going to have a vow renewal and do it the way we originally planned on getting married.

    • Reply
  • K
    Savvy January 2018
    Katouchka ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I understand exactly what you mean. I taught about the court house wedding as well. My fiance wants a big wedding. We are saving and help from my mom. I picked my date 01/20/2018. Do not do anything for people, do what is best for you and your family.

    • Reply
  • Meagen
    VIP October 2017
    Meagen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Don't miss out what you want because you're in a hurry. That said, courthouse weddings can absolutely be wonderful. Just make sure it's what you actually want and not a means to an end.

    • Reply
  • Vilma
    Expert September 2018
    Vilma ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Im having a nice reception at a country club and doing a courthouse wedding beforehand. We dont want a ceremony because there are too many religions in our families so instead of being careful and offending anyone, we will just skip it! Thats even with my mom offering to pay for the ceremony, flowers snd music if we agreed to marry in a Catholic church. Since we dont feel it in our hearts to do so, we said thank you but declined

    • Reply
  • Must Love Cats
    Master October 2017
    Must Love Cats ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Celebrities Kristen Bell and Dax Shepherd had a courthouse wedding. They looked quite happy.

    • Reply
  • Seale
    Master November 2017
    Seale ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I'm actually envious of the courthouse weddings I've seen on here. If I could convince FH to do one, I'd probably already be married with pictures of a beautiful courthouse wedding. However, if a smaller event isn't your thing, then save up for the bigger party.

    • Reply
  • TIFFANY
    Super July 2017
    TIFFANY ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I say do what's right for you and him. If you are set on having a big wedding give yourselves two years so you can pay things off and try your best to keep a low budget.

    • Reply
  • Meaghan
    VIP November 2017
    Meaghan ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    My FH and I are doing what I'm calling a hybrid wedding and renting a house large enough for immediate family for the weekend and my dad (who is getting ordained for this) is going to marry us there with immediate family and a wedding party - it's more intimate and ultimately what we can afford - I totally agree with some previous commenters on here sit down and do a pro/con sheet for us having money for our future together (kids, house etc) was way more important then saving up and waiting for a traditional wedding! But everyone is different pick what is right for you and your FH, not anyone else and certainly not what you think you "should" do

    • Reply
  • Chelsi
    Devoted June 2017
    Chelsi ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    You could always do a courthouse wedding now, since it's what you can afford at the moment, and for one of your anniversaries do a large wedding, more of a vow renewal, if you still want one. That's how my brother and sister in law did theirs. They are having a "wedding wedding" for their 10th anniversary.

    • Reply
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    I agree with this. Quite offensive. I would have more regret over debt.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Agree with this. It's also offensive to say that the legal elopement can/should be ignored after you have one in order to call the big reception afterward your 'real' wedding despite the new trend in doing so.
    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics