Cousin who wants to invite her bf

You are way too early to even be thinking about a seating chart or someone's "new boyfriend". In 2020, they will be together 2 years. He won't be new.

You are too early to worry or talk in any way about it now, except on here. But once you have decided how to handle it, the principles involved, when it gets to be final guest list time, if she or anyone else who is mot very close but family, has a very recent boyfriend, you will have thought about it and know what you ate going to do. Meanwhile, this could save you from a major pitfall: Save the Dates. When you send them, only send them to people you are guaranteeing a seat for, who can never be cut from the list. It is fine to add people right up till actual invitations go out. So people only casually dating at the time of save the dates, just send a save to the principle guest, not the short term other by name or as a plus one. Commit yourself at final invitation time. Otherwise, said casual relationship might break up, and you may find someone bringing someone they met at a party 2 weeks before.

I'm cutthroat w things. Dont invite her or tell her u dont have room for her a +1 due to building capacity or whichever reason. All family is not friends and a lot can get jealous.. I'm more of the little bad conscience on ur shoulder lol...

It sounds like she isn't the person you want at the wedding in general! I would save yourself a headache if at all possible! However, if you feel strongly against NOT inviting her then I would tend to think or strongly suggest allowing a plus one. It's typical, though I do understand budgetary issues and space constraints. If she truly hasn't been there for you in the past I would just not invite her personally and if someone says something I would be honest and say that you only want close friends & family there for your big day. If SHE comes to you and asks about it I would also just come out and say I am sorry but I don't agree with you on our level of friendship and closeness. No one should feel guilted into having someone in their bridal party nor inviting them to their wedding due to blood/marriage.

Considering that your wedding isn't until 2020 you have plenty of time to let their relationship blossom or end. Don't stress about that stuff yet...

This isn't even something you should be worried about right now. Your wedding is in 2020, you have so much time to figure out your final guest list. They could be broken up or married by then.

If you think she will bring the BF anyway, why not just include a plus one for her. That makes it easier on you in regards to planning, and it’s the right thing to do.

As far as the rest of it, if she doesn’t have your number maybe you can reach out to her, if you’re concerned that she never talks to you? And I don’t see why you’d feel obligated or pressured to have her as a bridesmaid. Doesn’t sound like you are close, so why have her as a bridesmaid?

Since you have plenty of time, I would not worry too much about it right now. However, to answer the question to your dilemma, I would probably not invite her, unless not inviting her would cause some unneeded riff in your family.

Granted, I am inviting all of my cousins, even though the vast majority of them live out of state and I haven't seen in awhile. The one who does live here, I initially didn't want to invite because she's extremely loud and boisterous. And when I say loud, I MEAN loud. She really rubs me and my FH the wrong way, but when I mentioned it to my mom, she told me that there would be an issue if I didn't invite her, so I am biting the bullet and sticking her towards the back, so I don't have to hear her! Besides, I might actually get a gift or money from her, so I guess that's the only plus? lol

As far as your cousin wanting to be a bridesmaid, I wouldn't even bring it up to her. Let is slide and ask those who are truly the closest to you and love you unconditionally. If she brings it up, tell her you already picked your BMs. If she's takes offense, too bad! It's your wedding, you don't want other people dictating your day!

In my opinion, I feel like maybe you should just not invite her to save yourself the headache and stress since it bothers you that much. About the plus one issue (also in my opinion) i don't feel like guests should automatically get a plus one just because they dont want to come alone. They could always be sat at a table with other guests they know so it's not exactly like they are alone. I mean obviously when someone gets invited it is also an invitation for their significant other because that's the right thing to do since they are in a relationship but as far as giving a plus one for someone who doesnt want to come alone I don't agree with it because I wouldn't want a total stranger at my wedding. I feel like family and close friends should be the only ones there considering that a wedding is a very intimate event not just some house party or birthday party. And you also have to consider the fact that catering is expensive already so i wouldnt want to spend a tremendous amount of money on catering to feed extra guests that have no business coming to my wedding anyways since they dont even know me. Its just my point of view i know others will disagree completely but just voicing my opinion.