Dear Bride....A letter from a Photographer

I think some of the comments some of the other brides made are because some of the women (not saying you) made some disparaging comments about people spending large amounts on their wedding and/or photographer. If it isn't in your budget, it isn't in your budget. I get that. We worked hard to save up a lot for our wedding and I did a lot of DIY. But we had to have a long engagement to get there. Photography was important to me so I found a way to make it work with someone who was both reasonable and whose work I was happy with.

I saw the story about the English couple and I wonder, did they look at videos beforehand? I know they paid a professional but did they research who they were going into business with? Just because you pay someone doesn't mean they'll be great, but thats why you research who you go into business with. A lot of times that isn't possible when you go with someone who isn't a photographer. That couple had recourse (at least monetarily) because they had a cont

Contract with a professional. In the case of using a friend who is free if they don't show up and take your pictures, or the pictures are a total mess you don't have any legal grounds to pursue action against them, you don't have any pictures AND you could ruin a friendship.

I would never allow a mistake in photography ruin a friendship - my friends are far to important to me...people always matter more than things IMO. I also would never rely on just one person to take all my photos. Not only that, I am somewhat of a control freak about certain things and plan to take as many of the pictures as I can. As for the others, I'm sure one of the MANY family members photographing the ceremony will get a few good shots

My ex and I paid for a pro photographer. The pics sat in an album, gathering dust until we finally divorced and then they were thrown away.

As far as the English couple, I'm aware of researching, but my point was people saying to go with a cheaper package and then when it doesn't turn out, saying 'well you get what you pay for'. I don't want to throw away any money on a cheap package, because I DO KNOW that 'you get what you pay for'. And that's all we would be able to pay for. That's all I'm saying.

Actually (and sadly), we couldn't even pay for the cheap package at this point lol!!

@Brian Noah I just read a few of your comments and in the circumstance you described, I can totally understand why you wrote the letter you did. I think that some women are upset because I'm pretty darn sure that photography IS important to us but because our budgets are so low (I saw one of $1000) professional photography just ISN'T an option. But you have all these people on here saying "then photography isn't your priority". As I said earlier...what's the point of a pro if there's nothing to take pictures of because I spent my whole budget on a photographer? If I go with a friend or family member at least I can have the wedding, my memories and if nothing else, a few crappy photos of it all.

I agree with you Michelle! I am a decently priced photographer, but I understand that PICTURES are a priority, where photography is not always a priority. I don't think that just because you cannot afford a Mercedes, that you shouldn't be able to drive. A lot of photographers do, and that is not fair. Yes we want to save you from disappointment, but so does the Mercedes dealer when you leave to buy a Kia. What it comes down to is expectations. I watch so many court shows where the bride and groom went with a $500-1500 and had so many problems instead of going with the $5000 Photog. Well the problem is that often that is not from the brides and groom who only have $1000-$5000 budget. But from those that are spending $35K on a wedding and still want a $1500 photographer. Then YES, Pictrues are the priority, but not the photography. For peace of mind, I always advise people to stay between 15-35% of the total wedding budget for photos. If you are on a $1000 budget and feel that you...

...that you wont be able to find a good photographer, I suggest still offering $150-$350 for gas/exp for a good photographer who may not be as experienced in wedding photography, but paying per image for the photos that you want. I started out just that way. $15-25 per image. (Any photographers who read this and gets offended, send me an email. We are in business to serve our clients and provide great images to these brides.) While you still may come out spending over $2000 you were able to get the photos you really wanted at the terms you could afford, at the time you could afford it.

Leighton

Can I add that, as an aspiring photographer myself who is doing her first wedding shoot for a family member, sometimes they DO put all the thought into it and are still willing to take that chance? and it's a HUGE help for someone like me who needs that shot, that chance, to really get going. It's the "photographer", and issues arise when the photographer thinks too highly of themselves and the bride beleives them since they are a friend. but I think too often people doubt the amateur (and I can see why, as a bride-to-be... ugh, the offers I've gotten. Hells to the NO!!! )

Just wanted to add that in Let the bride make their mistakes. They dont do the research.... THEY GOT CRAPPY SHOTS!!

@mynameskatie: I was not so much responding to the photographer as responding to prior posters who said things like, "Would you have a friend make your dress? might as well if you don't get any good pics of it," and, "And what's the point in that super expensive cake if there aren't any photos to remember it by?" These comments seemed to suggest that photos should be the first priority for everyone having more than a courthouse wedding, because all the other expenses will be wasted if you don't get good photos of the results.

(cont.)

At our wedding, the first priority was getting to celebrate with family and friends, and taking good care of our guests. So we went low-budget on our dresses, but then splurged on a house where everyone could stay for two days, so that we could have relaxed time with our guests outside of formal events. Our at-home reception was at a very unphotogenic location, but that enabled us to afford a location that was in downtown DC, centrally located so all our friends could get there.

I will say that our professional photos were much better than the amateur photos taken at the same time. If anyone wants to compare them, you can send me a message or e-mail me using the form at this link, and I'll be happy to tell you where they are.

@Bre- that's why these photogs have spend YEARS, literally, learning photography as second shooters, mostly unpaid. It's unconscionable to ask a bride to "take a chance" on a photographer that has never shot another wedding.

So this question is for the photogs. How do you feel about using a second shooter with years of experience as a second shooter who is starting their own business? If the person has insurance back up equipment and has a good portfolio and good pre and post editing work.

Geez there's a ton of back lashing and all in this thread. I understand completely what some girls mean by they don't have the money for a big wedding. We're doing a lot of cutting back to pay for the hall. My FH refuses to pay a lot for photography so I am kind of stuck on having to go for a cheap photographer. We haven't booked anyone yet but still looking.

Here's the thing, I saw something about $33,000 for a wedding? Well, we are far off from that. We have a budget set at $4,000 and I just had a dentist appointment to replace my crown so there goes more of my money and less towards the wedding. It's depressing and all but I am still gonna work hard to have a wedding. I plan on only getting married once and I want my friends and family there.

If you can't afford a big wedding, then by no means does it mean you shouldn't get married. You can still have a small wedding and there are lots of ways to do it for budget conscious brides.

This photographer has a legitamate point, but gave it in a completely unprofessional way! speaking as a studying photographer, it IS a huge undertaking if you don't have experience in what you're doing, whether you know how to use your speedlight or not. that's not to say your friend won't do an amazing job, because she absolutely can. An important thing to think about is if you will be horribly upset if she misses some moments (which even professionals do, but it's a lot easier to stay mad at a friend for it than someone you never see again). And as far as albums go, it is SO easy to make albums these days, professional photog or not.

I hope whatever you chose works out perfectly for you! If there are any questions I can answer to help, by all means ask away!

Something that I didn't see mentioned was the quality of prints and albums.

Sure, you may not look at your pictures all the time. But wouln't you like your kids and grandkids to see them? Because prints from Walmart won't allow that.

I will say this....I too had to compromise and in the end my photographer (friend) over looked some very special moments....such as me, my husband and my two daughters together and a picture of the bride and groom and my parents This day is so special. I cannot duplicate these pics ever and I am so sad.... because he is gone. This day is soooooooooooo special you only have one chance to get it right.

Sometimes I am tempted to send a letter like that to brides who use a friend or relative as their photographer too. I do understand how expensive the wedding is and how much I charge for my photography. I am just saying, compare the risk with the reward (cost). Honestly, my advice is "if you can't tell the difference between good and not so good photography, go for it. But if you can afford it, you are better off with a pro. The difference isn't that an amateur can't get a good or great picture, it's that a pro can get the picture under just about any conditions. Those include bad lighting, not missing the shot, having backup equipment for cameras, lens, and flashes, and having the experience to know how to deal with just about any situation.

I will say this. There are TONS of shot's that are missed even by Dennis Reggie or Michael Colon. What matters are the ones that are captured and if they are a true reflection of the couple and of the day. The experienced PRO knows that and will as some have said capture under almost all conditions, rain or shine.

@Chuwana, the benefit of having a second shooter for a photographer is by having a 2nd set of eyes. There is very little pressure on the 2nd shooter compared to the hired photographer. That being said, there are photographers in my area who are awesome that I would never have 2nd shoot for me, because their style is completely different than from my own. That being said, I have 2nd shot for photographers who were hired by clients who didn't hire me to begin with, so what does that say?

I hope that answers your question unless you meant that you are in business to BE a 2nd shooter?

@LDphotography No I meant to save money is it a good idea to hire someone looking to start their own business who has worked as a second shooter for another company. Before their price goes up.

OOOOOH...lol. I would say yes it is, but you will still have to deal with the extra variables because of the inexperience and not being able to "take control" of the recording of a wedding day. And yes even the best bridezilla wants her planner, or vendor to take control and bring your vision to life.

If you are really wanting professional quality but for less of a price, I would say to do what I mentioned earlier. Find one that you can pay for their expenses, and see if they offer an ala carte package. I know my ala carte collection is about 50% less compared to my starting complete collection. That being said, it is only 3 hours and includes printed proofs with online ability to purchase.

Also in your case, there are many photographers who offer either a print credit or discount for military service. If you know any PAOs as well, many of their journalists freelance, and have the ability to "check out" gear. So their overhead is rediculously low compared to a traditional. cont...