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Rachel
Savvy September 2020

Depression setting in

Rachel, on July 30, 2020 at 9:23 AM

Posted in Community Conversations 42

I have been planning, doing the graphic designs, calling people and emailing people; just about everything for the wedding myself. I enjoy doing that stuff. I'm an artist and also very organized person, but now we are postponing the wedding for the second time and I'm starting to get depressed about...
I have been planning, doing the graphic designs, calling people and emailing people; just about everything for the wedding myself. I enjoy doing that stuff. I'm an artist and also very organized person, but now we are postponing the wedding for the second time and I'm starting to get depressed about it. I put a lot of time and effort into making everything really great and working things out for both my fiance and myself. In addition I've also had to somehow make it through the drama of his mom (she's kinda crazy.. like seriously. He even warned me!) and finally come to grips with her I guess. Finally, I'm also doing all of this because I know it's really important for my family members. And I want them to come together and be apart of sending us off together for our "new" married life. Than we can start having kiddies!



I've just been down in the dumps the last couple days. I don't even know what to do anymore. I had a lot of hope... and usually I can climb out of bad things easy-peasy like, but this time I'm really feeling down. Maybe I'm looking for advice or kind words... I dunno, but it seems like weddingwire is pretty supportive for us brides.
-♥️- Rachel
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42 Comments

  • Rachel
    Savvy September 2020
    Rachel ·
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    Hi Everyone,

    We went through with the wedding. His entire family didn't show up. That's partly due to Covid and partly due to them not being able to afford renting a car and such and probably 80% due to his Mother's control. It is what is is. We tried our hardest. Offering to buy them a plane ticket, buy their hotel, everything. Still not one word or call or text from them. Both Kieran and I were pretty stressed out. On the day of the wedding his Mom texted me 3 or 4 paragraphs of hate, which I only looked at the first few sentences and realized she must be really unhappy, so I just said, "I'm really sorry you have these feelings. I love Kieran. I hope you enjoy the rest of your day." At that point there was nothing else I could do. She wrote the similar things to my husband and it really hurt him. But don't fret. Once we walked into the church and went through with the wedding everything changed. Kieran was happy again and I was happy that he was happy. We had over 200 friends and family watching our live stream!! It was amazing! My family was supporting him to the max and I think now he realizes that we are going to be behind him and we will stand up to the plate with him, supporting him, loving him, encouraging him. Things he never had before. Thinking about it makes me cry.

    Now we will move on, making our own path. At first I thought I don't ever want to hear and see his Mother again, but that might not be the right thing to do. Sure, I won't go out of my way for her and her family members, but I won't shut them out completely. Well, we'll just see.

    So, everyone who is really really stressed out maybe I can offer you this.... do what YOU KNOW DEEP IN YOUR HEART IS RIGHT! Only YOU know. Your own fiance might not even know, but YOU DO. DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU and HIM and not what is best for everyone else. Because that's who it's always going to be.. you and him.

    I'm so happy, despite the amazing amount of stress there was, that we went through with our wedding. Cheers! and Thanks for all your encouragement everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • Crystal
    Devoted October 2020
    Crystal ·
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    I'm glad you're able to see the silver lining in this. And had an amazing day despite his family.


    I am upset for you. (which is probably my own issues identifying with happened) It was inappropriate to behave like that to you both. And a mother, in my mind, should always love her son.

    I would walk away completely from his mother. I think anyone who is willing to be like that has no sense of empathy and it's classless.

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