Destination Wedding?

I didn't have this issue, but a girl I used to work with did. Her entire family lived in California and his entire family lived in South Carolina. They decided that if any family would have to travel a long way, then all family should have to travel. Just to keep it fair. They ended up having their wedding in Colorado

That's the same thing we ran into. All of my family lives in Arkansas and his family is all over (France, Colorado, Florida, KC, etc). I got pressured from my family in Arkansas to have it there and luckily his family was more chill about it. I know several of my family members won't be able to attend, but that would have been the case if we chose to do it anywhere other than Arkansas. We decided to do Florida because everyone would have to travel except his parents who are hosting/paying for portions of the wedding. Don't let family pressure you into something you don't want. You can have a reception/party at hometowns for people who aren't able to make it.

I think with any DW it's critical to accept that there may be people who will not be able to attend for financial/time off/health/whatever reasons, and the couple needs to be fully accepting of that when they make the decision. On this forum one of my least favorite things to read is, "those who love you will be there." I think that's fairly naive and potentially sets people up for disappointment/hurt feelings later when VIP guests have to decline for whatever their own reasons are. As with all things wedding, this is very much a know your crowd issue. I thought a community member said it really well the other day on another post. She shared that her relatives do not have many financial resources, so it is highly unlikely they would attend a DW. That doesn't mean they don't love her, it just means they wouldn't be able to attend anything but a local wedding. I agree a couple can/should do whatever they want to, but it would be wise to thoughtfully consider all the potential ramifications. In the case of OP, I can see the appeal of Vegas. We live in So Cal and have made the drive to Boise in one VERY long 15-17 hour day, and we have the resources to travel. Would it be less of a hassle for us to drive 4 hours and meet up with everyone in Vegas? Of course, but if there are 30 people in Idaho, who probably wouldn't make the trip to Vegas due to cost/health/whatever, and those 30 people are super important, I'd probably go with Idaho. Not an easy decision.... Good luck!

MOB So Cal nailed it. This is the best response I have ever read regarding this topic. I think it's important that no mater where it's held, that the most important people in your lives are able to attend. That might be his family traveling to your family, vice versa, or everyone else traveling. For us, we talked to my VIPs in my family and asked if they could make it to Florida and luckily they'll be able to. I think there will only be about 5ish who won't be able to make it, so we are very fortunate there. If my aunt or grandma wouldn't be able to make the trip, we would have considered holding it in Arkansas. We plan on doing a reception there afterwards where the rest of my family and church can attend and feel included. It's never an easy decision, but hopefully talking to your VIP guests will help a little. I wish you the best of luck!

I wanted a fall wedding. We live in Florida (no seasons here) but I am from upstate new york. All my family is up there and further north into NH. I wanted the fall colors and that was my deciding factor. All of his family is here in FL or GA and if we did it here in FL all my family was still going to need to travel anyways so we opted to make both families travel (in hopes to have a smaller wedding too). We booked in Gatlinburg TN so we could have the fall leaves and pumpkins and mountains and beautiful pictures! 11 days away now!