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Savvy November 2024

diy Dinner Opinions

Thomas, on August 13, 2023 at 9:43 PM Posted in Planning 0 35

Hi guys,

I made this profile to do some research on here about DIY weddings and am just looking for opinions.
My fiancée and I are planning to hold a "cocktail" type of reception but with assigned seating at tables that people will be sitting at through the ceremony and reception to avoid room flips.
We're planning on having a few traditional wedding games and probably karaoke as well since the two of us find just sitting around socializing pretty boring and we're not really into dancing too much (there will be dancing, we just don't want that to be the only entertainment). We also love games and singing, so we want to have something more our style. We're planning on having tea, coffee and some mocktails set up on a table not too far from the bar for people who don't want to drink, or who simply want to add a shot to them like our "signature drinks".
We're planning on having 2 double wide rows of tables and having tiered plates down the middle for the food, along with a separate dessert buffet table. We want everything to be finger food, but are doing the food ourselves. So we're thinking of ordering 3 or 4 types of subs with just the meat and cheese, and cutting them into 4. We'll arrange them on the top tier in the center with fancy toothpicks so they don't fall apart, with a lower tier of vegetable toppings, and a bottom tier with artisan vegetable chips and condiments. This will all be arranged on multiple small plates that repeat down the line. The the dessert buffet will consist of glazed donuts, cookies, tarts and individual ambrosia salads.
If you were to attended 4 or 5 hour event like this on a Friday evening would you be satisfied with sandwiches, chips and desserts to eat? Mainly we're thinking this is the easiest way to go for lack of prep and equipment as well as budget friendly because it's all coming from a local sub shop and bakery we enjoy instead of a caterer.

35 Comments

Latest activity by Thomas, on August 19, 2023 at 12:38 AM
  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    If you're hosting an event over a mealtime, you need to provide a meal or at least heavy apps (sliders, mashed potato cups etc, ) to make a meal. An option would be to have a lunchtime wedding and serve sandwiches there.

    How are you planning to store and serve the food within food safe guidelines for temperature? You'll need to keep cold food cold, and warm foot hot. Who will be serving and doing the clean up? Do you have a bartender to keep an eye on consumption and over serving?

    It might be better to look into having some pasta dishes ordered in if you have a small group. In many ways DIY weddings can be a lot more work, and there's actually a post about that today.

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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    Our venue contract includes a bartender and 2 servers. It'll be open bar, and the venue does have catering, but nothing was finger food or truthfully anything we would enjoy, so we didn't add on their catering. They have a commercial kitchen that a caterer of our choosing or we can use. I think we'll have the ceremony at 8pm and probably go to 12 or so. The venue staff will handle bringing it out and clearing when done, with a large walk in fridge to store everything until the reception. The venue also doesn't require much decorating, so we would be setting up everything in the morning and picking up/prepping the food, then getting ready and taking photos before people start arriving.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    Ok I see. Sounds a bit more manageable, but I still always advise to hire professionals, just in case.

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  • K
    Super September 2023
    Kimberly ·
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    I would just double check your contract with your venue to make sure you’re allowed to provide your own food (if you haven’t already). Many venues require vendors with professional licenses for liability purposes. Otherwise it sounds like you have a game plan. Sandwiches don’t necessarily scream dinner reception, but as a guest I try to appreciate what the hosts are serving and not everyone has the budget for more. It does sound like you’ll have enough food (as long as you order enough servings for your guest count), but if you wanted to get something more substantial for dinner, you could also cut down on the desserts to allocate more for the main entree. And I would just make sure your dress code matches the tone of the evening.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    Yeah, everything is good to go with the venue, we're not making it, just plating. They even suggested buying grocery store trays and re-plating there. As long as we keep the receipts, we're covered.
    We're more just concerned about only having sandwiches and desserts. We're factoring in a equivalent of a sub per person, about a cup or so of the vegetable chips and lots of drinks and desserts. For the tiered trays we were even thinking on using different sized Mason jars with battery tea lights to sit the plates on to make it look for romantic. We've already been going through thrift stores and collecting various "crystal-cut" glass dishes in the sizes we need to use for the food. Would store bought salads seem as a better side then the vegetable chips? We were thinking along these lines at first, but changed to the vegetable chips to give a pop of colour and to keep down the mess since it's being served family style.
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  • Rhondayalex
    Dedicated September 2023
    Rhondayalex ·
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    Thomas, if I were to attend an 8pm event on a Friday evening, I would have most likely already had dinner and would not be interested in sandwiches. I would most likely be interested in chips, mini quiches, pot stickers, shrimp cocktail. If sandwiches, something that's grab and go - not something I need to top. So, mini sliders or slider subs that are ready to eat. Ultimately you know your guests. Go with what they'd enjoy.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    Well we're not doing "slider subs" but we were planning on buying a few different types and cutting them into 3-inch sandwiches. We were thinking on mini quiches, pot stickers, meatballs, etc but our venue and nothing like that, and after contacting pretty much every caterer in our city, they all want to charge $2-4 a piece, plus delivery, it still needs to be plated, and most have a 100 person minimum when we've got only 60ish guests. At this point we're more looking for easy alternative options that can be purchased and plated fairly painlessly, that isn't too messy.
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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    Do a quick check at your local grocery store for their catering (hot foods) prices. Here in Florida, Publix has amazing prices for their various platters - both hot AND cold. It might open up your options a bit.
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  • A
    Just Said Yes December 2023
    Alex77 ·
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    I agree with Jack .It is better to hire someone professional than taking care of this much duties. Double-check everything, if you are planning to coordinate this. About the food, I think sandwiches aren't a good option.

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  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
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    I'm sorry, but to answer your question directly: if I attended an evening wedding reception and dinner consisted of a sandwich and chips, then no--I would not be happy. What you are describing sounds fine for a casual daytime wedding reception, but not for a 4-5 hour evening reception. I would either plan on serving a proper meal or moving the time of your wedding to occur during the day/afternoon.

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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    I have to agree with Hannah. What you are describing sounds more appropriate for a casual afternoon wedding.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    Sorry I meant 4-5hours from start to finish, meaning the ceremony, photos & reception. We are thinking 8 for ceremony, 8:30 for a outfit change, 9 until about 12-1 for reception.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    Do you have any ideas of room temperature finger foods that could be just purchased plated & served?
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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    For an evening wedding, I don’t think room temperature finger foods are appropriate. Evening weddings are typically more formal and include an actual hot meal. Let’s break this down. Your ceremony is going to start at 8:00 PM. That means people are going to start arriving at 7:30 PM. I don’t know how far the venue is for your guest, but let’s say it’s close. That means people will be leaving their homes at approximately 7-7:15 PM. Prior to that, they will need to get ready. People spend on average about one hour to get ready for an event. So that means they will start getting ready at approximately 6:00 PM. Considering most people get off work around 5:00 PM, that will not leave them enough time to make the commute home and eat dinner. Your guests are going to be hungry and ready to eat a substantial meal by 8:00 PM!
    Finger sandwiches, chips, room temperature finger foods, etc. are perfectly fine to have at a wedding. Just not a formal evening wedding. It is appropriate for an extremely casual afternoon wedding.




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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    I also wanted to add – the example given above is assuming all your guests live close and won’t have to drive any distance to get to the venue. It is also assuming they do not have children they will need to attend to, or take to a babysitter, etc. You add in those factors, and the timeline becomes even tighter.


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  • Kelly
    Super October 2023
    Kelly ·
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    I agree with others that a professional would be best. Despite your venue being okay with self catering, that's a lot of work and a lot can go wrong. Also as a guest at an evening wedding, I would expect a meal.

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  • C
    CM ·
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    I have to agree that sandwiches are appropriate to an afternoon affair not an evening reception. People will undoubtedly be expecting a meal at a Friday evening wedding.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    My fiancée suggested the finger sandwiches & antipasto plates still, but with maybe sliced up quiche & german potato salad. Again all purchased from local restaurants, then cut & plated.
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  • T
    Savvy November 2024
    Thomas ·
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    We also looked back over the limited options the venue has again. We might be able to get them to do plates of buns & croissants, meat & cheese & deviled egg plates, with garden salad, then have individual bowls of soup served to everyone. Do you think this plan, along with the dessert buffet is better?
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  • C
    CM ·
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    It still sounds like a casual lunch menu. I’d plan a luncheon on a different day or consider a change of venue if Friday night is all that’s available here.
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