DJ Planner for Gay Wedding

Honestly, I'd just cross out groom or son and put bride or daughter. It's probably a generic form that he found online or something.

Yea, why don't you let the man run his own business and you just fill out the form however you feel comfortable. Why is it your job to fix it for him?

Apparently no one who responded so far has had the experience of dealing with a vendor who jut didn't get them. It seems like a small thing, but it's not a small thing if you're in a non traditional relationship and you get sick of explaining things.

All our forms are sexless; when I have a conversation with my couples I do let them know that the sample ceremonies I am going to send them are all one guy, one girl. That doesn't reflect our enthusiasm for our SS couples, it really is a bi-product of being busy.

I think you have a conversation with them. If they realize that they need to change? Keep them. If they don't? I'd look elsewhere.

Hi Jillian! We are also two brides and have had our fair share of...hurdles when explaining we are SS. In the initial planning stages I had vendors refuse services based on that. It's not legal in our state (IL) but we don't want bad energy on our day anyway. I understand that seeing bride/groom everywhere can feel alienating.

I would just suggest it to him as PP have said. He may not want you to, he may do it himself or may not be receptive at all. You can make your decision based on his response.

Also, Celia you're awesome. I always appreciate a vendor who puts in the effort to see it from the other side. To a heterosexual couple this doesn't seem like a big deal. But to those of us that have experienced it, it makes a bigger impact than some know

Thank you Celia! I will not settle for just crossing groom out. I'm paying money for his services and have no problem requesting he make it an inclusive form. He has no problem making the changes either. I'm just trying to help him out as he'd like to make gay friendly forms and asked for my opinion.

Fall Bride, we loved the Garrison but it's outside of our budget but we are getting married at their sister property down the street. It has the same executive chef as the Garrison.

I just crossed out things and rewrote them. Ex: introducing the new Mr and Mrs blank! I'm not changing my name, so we rewrote that line. I had to add in best lady and groomslady. I get that it's a generic form and it's whatever.

Funny addition: there was a line Are you having a dollar dance? Yes No. I underlined and circled No a bunch lol

Baletica, thank you! I already had he convo with him and he is very open. Obviously wouldn't book with him if he isn't. I was just looking for things I may not have thought of as all djs probably ask different questions. He is excited to make his forms more inclusive for his future gay clients and is just looking for advice which I offered without being asked.

@Jillian I'm really glad you found him so open. These little things really do matter. The school where I work registers the student's parents as Parent 1 and Parent 2, not mother and father, and we've had many queer parents tell us how welcome that makes them feel.

@Celia - you are so damn awesome. If I was getting married anywhere near NY, you would be my absolute first choice of officiant.

His forms should be sexless in my opinion, but I don't think it's your place to tell him to update it. I think if he was smart, he would take you up on your offer to help update the form in case he ever works with a SS couple again, because it makes a huge difference and can really help him grow his business. I totally get that you are paying for his service and you want it written out a certain way, which he should do if he wants to work with you.

@Fall Bride - We went to the Garrison for lunch to test out the food and it was amazing! We've also had a friend attend a wedding at our venue so we're super happy with our choice. It's a bit early for florist hunting, but if you happen to recall the name of the one you saw or even used that would be great. Did you get a hotel block somewhere? I'm all set with photography and DJ but any vendors you loved working with I'm open to suggestions.

Thank you to those who posted suggestions! I appreciate it.

@Fall Bride, I will check Arcadia Floral out. I want to get my block done early since there aren't a ton of options. We are using Sarma & Co for photography.

Celia, I assume you meant by-product, but the pun in bi-product is just too good.

I filled out some forms that had Partner 1/Partner 2 etc. I agree that all wedding services here should have this now that same sex marriage is legal nationwide.

Thanks! I will check out the Hyatt House in Fishkill. We found Sarma on the list from the venue and love her. Thanks for all the suggestions!