Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Savvy October 2019

Do i need to give wedding gifts to my cousin who did not give me anything?

Flag
Hide content

Samantha, on July 28, 2019 at 1:59 PM

My cousin just got engaged, which is very exciting for her - so I’m sure she’ll be beginning the wedding festivities soon! With that being said, I don’t feel inclined to give her a gift for her shower OR her wedding. She did not give me or my sister gifts for our showers (she did not attend, and as she lives far away and I don’t plan to attend hers either), and she did not give my sister a wedding gift, so I am not expecting one from her come my wedding in October.

Her mother thinks her kids can do no wrong and I know she would be shocked if I didn’t give her daughter any gifts, though I’m also sure she’s unaware that her daughter didn’t give me anything either.

Do I need to give a gift just because it is proper etiquette? Or am I justified in not wanting to gift her anything?

Show all

27 Comments

Devoted December 2019
Samantha · on July 28, 2019 at 5:28 PM
Flag

Hide content
Take the high road on this one and a gift (even a small thoughtful one is fine).
- Reply
Expert November 2019
Keri · on July 28, 2019 at 5:30 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
White Elephant gift? Funny.

Literally any other occasion? Kinda still funny, but random.
- Reply
Master December 2019
Courtney · on July 28, 2019 at 5:37 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment

Nope this was for my birthday. It still had the Marshalls clearance sticker on it, too.
- Reply
Savvy October 2019
Samantha · on July 28, 2019 at 6:03 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
I will definitely be at her wedding, I likely won’t attend her shower.
- Reply
VIP October 2020
Kelly · on July 28, 2019 at 6:10 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Then give her a gift or money. It doesn't have to be a lot. Ikea has ~$1 potato peelers if you want to really pinch pennies over it.
- Reply
Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on July 28, 2019 at 7:13 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment

Dying over the $1 IKEA potato peelers! In all seriousness OP, you could get her something small like a gift card or some cash
- Reply

Lady · on July 29, 2019 at 3:14 PM
Flag

Hide content
It's pretty normal to not give a gift if you dont' attend a shower. So you dont' need to be snarky about that. IF you're not attending hers, it's totally fine not to send a gift. I wouldn't do that just bc she didn't give you one though.
SInce it's a cousin and you're presumably close - I would send a wedding gift whether I attended or not.
- Reply