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Sophie
Devoted June 2022

Do You Include "i Do" Part Even if Writing Your Own Vows?

Sophie, on February 26, 2020 at 9:48 PM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 1 16

Hi all,

Such a dumb question here but I'm just not totally getting it. We are writing our own vows. Does the officiant still say something along the lines below after we say our vows, or do we take this part out because we're writing our own?

Officiant:

Josh, do you take Sophie to be your lawfully wedded wife?

Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect her, forsaking all others, and holding only unto her forevermore?

[“I do.”]

And Sophie, do you take Josh to be your husband?

Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect him, forsaking all others, and holding only unto him forevermore?

[“I do.”]


Thank you!

16 Comments

Latest activity by Jana, on May 9, 2020 at 2:47 AM
  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    You can include it ! I did even after saying my own written vows
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    The “I do’s” aren’t part of your vows, it’s called the declaration of intent. In some states it’s required.
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  • M
    VIP October 2021
    Monica ·
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    Following. I told my pastor we want to say the traditional I dos & write our own vows. We haven’t talked about the ceremony yet
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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    I’m pretty sure you have to! If you leave out the “declaration of intent” you’re not legally married
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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    We had something similar before we said our own vows.

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  • Kaitlyn
    Dedicated March 2020
    Kaitlyn ·
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    Agreed! I feel like I've been to weddings where they basically incorporated vows into the declaration of intent

    "Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect her, forsaking all others, and holding only unto her forevermore?" I would consider these vows (if you want them to be).

    The "Do you take X to be your lawfully wedded spouse" and responding "I do" is the declaration of intent. If you are writing your own vows, you could most likely forgo the "Do you promise to..." part.

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    Got it, so if you're writing your own vows, the "I Do" part comes right before you say the vows that you wrote?


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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    Great to know, thanks!

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    Got it, thanks for the info!

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    We are just starting to figure it out now! I'm totally clueless haha

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    LOL wow this shows how little I know about this Smiley xd thank you!

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    Sounds good, we'll probably try to incorporate into one thing so it flows well!

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  • M
    VIP October 2021
    Monica ·
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    Lol me too
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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    That's what our pastor did at least!

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  • Sophie
    Devoted June 2022
    Sophie ·
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    Good to know, thanks so much!
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  • J
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    Talk to your officiant about adapting the wording into your vows. And finding out what the exact legalities are.

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