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Sarah
Expert November 2018

Does anyone else's FI have problems with the bride getting the attention?

Sarah, on November 15, 2017 at 9:17 AM

Posted in Community Conversations 44

Let me start out by saying that I've done everything g I can to get the attention off of me and onto US as a couple whenever this happens. I'm also not one of the people making him feel this way but... Whenever people say "it's your day" to me and not him his face drops. Whenever people say "you're...

Let me start out by saying that I've done everything g I can to get the attention off of me and onto US as a couple whenever this happens. I'm also not one of the people making him feel this way but...

Whenever people say "it's your day" to me and not him his face drops. Whenever people say "you're the bride!" He gets kinda frustrated. He also expressed to me that he wishes he could walk down the isle (not sure where he got the idea that he couldn't. He's going to) and that it wasn't fair that I got an engagement ring and he didn't (I bought him one) I'm trying to make him realize that it's our day not my day but he still keeps getting weird about family putting the attention on me instead of us. I don't like it either and I ALWAYS explain that it is OUR day and that I am so excited to marry him and change the subject but it really seems to hurt him.

Is anyone else h I guess this issue and if so how do you deal with it?

44 Comments

  • C
    Expert September 2018
    catobx ·
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    FI doesn't care about that kind of thing, though I keep insisting to others who have hinted that that it is a day not just for me and us but for our family and good friends, it is a union of all of us. I know as the bride people will be looking at me but the groom is also looked at. FI is more of a conservative type and doesn't love the spotlight but he is so handsome I know people will be gawking at him too. There has been no conversation about upstaging each other. It isn't a competition. Traditionally, with the nice gown and bouquet and whatnot people always gravitate toward the bride. Is your FI insecure in other realms? Because assure him he will also get attention.

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  • brieliz
    VIP January 2017
    brieliz ·
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    If my H was upset like this, I'd say "welcome to the world from the point of view as a woman".

    Not getting attention, ignored at meetings. Maybe he'll learn some empathy for what women go through instead of being insecure.

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  • Olga
    Just Said Yes September 2023
    Olga ·
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    Omg tell him to grow a pair
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  • Olga
    Just Said Yes September 2023
    Olga ·
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    Tell him to grow up...
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