Dr. Seuss Wedding vows (the last part is added in the comments)

Oh lord - as I faint dead away.

no, just no. someone somewhere used those. ack

Oh, dear God.

Funny, if it were just a joke but, the fact that anyone used these seriously...

shockley.

I'm offended, these are my vows

It doesn't RHYME!!! The part about home and poem! You'd have to say home weird!!!!

If a couple was fun, and this was part of who they were, it would make me giggle, but it all depends on the couple, these could be, in the end perfect for someone.

So cute.

I love it! how adorable! lol so cute.

I don't like them.

Very cute

I just read them to FH. He laughed and said they were cute!

I still don't like them.

They are cute, but it definitely takes away from the seriousness of the vows. I am sure there is a couple out there somewhere that these are perfect for, but it's definitely not me

They're quite appropriate, if the bride and groom are Sneeches.

I thought they were cute and they made me laugh I'm not sure what FH will think.

@The Centerpiece, I just very much LOLed. Sneeches! I had that on VHS as a kid

I just realized that the last half got cut off here is the rest

Celebrant: Will you love with all your heart?

Will you love till death do you part?

Will you have and forever hold,

Each others’ hearts ‘till the stars grow cold?

Bride and Groom: I will love her/him forever a thousand fold,

‘Till death do us part and our blood grow cold,

Groom: Or until our brains grow mold.

Celebrant: Will you love through good and bad?

Will you love in times happy and sad?

Bride and Groom: I will love her/him through good and bad,

And in times happy and sad.

Bride: Cause he’s the best friend I ever had.

Celebrant: Will you take him as your mate?

Will you have her as your date?

From this day on and ever more,

No matter what your life may have in store?

Bride and groom: I will have her/him as my mate,

Starting on this our wedding date.

Bride: May as well, as it’s our fate.

Celebrant: If you’ll be wed through and through,

Please answer with the words:

Bride and Groom: I do!

"love him in a ditch?" get a room :snickers:

Totally off topic, but home and poem definitely rhyme to me. I was a COMM major so I love picking up new dialects. Where don't those two words rhyme?

I actually like them...some parts of it are realistic...

Poem is two syllables, home is only one. To me, they don't rhyme due to that reason.

Where exactly did you find this? It's a spin off my husband and I did on some Seuss vows we found online, but there are portions missing, and some incorrectly transcribed. For example, the line about brains growing mold was a deadpan "or since we live in Seattle, til our brains grow mold." And the part about rhyming was a joke on me because my husband can rhyme ad-lib and I cannot. It all rhymed AND was in proper cadence for Seuss. If you have the original link, I'd like to track it down.